Longing for Something
by Lyns26
Summary: Montgomery is a high school student and Liberty high. He is on the football team and has a great brotherhood of friends, but the impact of his homelife and the struggles with his sexuality is beating too much for him, he is deeply lonely and unhappy, but a new friendship with Alex Standall, will that all change? will he finally find what he's been longing for?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language.**

**A/N – hey guys, I hope you liked this chapter; this fic takes place in an AU although some of the original storylines are kept in it. Monty didn't sexually assault Tyler in this and Bryce isn't a rapist and the taps didn't happen. Enjoy!**

Montgomery De La Cruz is one of the king jocks at Liberty High school. Football and baseball player. He and his friends rule the school; well they like to think they do. To be honest most of the student body can't stand most of them; some of the things they do and say to other classmates can be seem as cruel and horrible. Bryce Walker and Montgomery seem to be the worst of the bunch. The footballer looks up to Bryce and tries every way to impress him, which can be taken too far at times, especially with his homophobic remarks to fellow classmates Tyler Down and Alex Standall. He shows this hot tempered asshole side around his buddies and other kids in the school, but truth is, he's breaking inside.

Every day is a struggle for him, pretending to be something he isn't, acting like he doesn't give a shit and takes out his anger on people who don't have a cruel bone in their body. He longs to be the person he wants to be, he wants to be free. Free from his abusive father, Free from those who would know the truth about him would never stop harassing him, especially around football, but most of all to be free to be who he is inside, to be the real Monty, but he can't and it kills him.

He wasn't like most other the guys on the football team, he wasn't rich, he didn't have nice expensive clothes or possessions and he defiantly doesn't go on luxury vacations, like Bryce Walker. He lives in a small house on the east side of town with his mother and father. His home life is mostly unbearable and spends most nights at Bryce's house. He felt so lucky to have a best friend like Bryce but a part of him is terrified if Bryce ever finds out about whom he is that the friendship will be officially over and forever mocked by him and his teammates.

"Dude, you still on for poker tonight, my place?" Bryce asks as he sits down at the lunch table in the cafeteria.

"Yeah man, count me in" Monty smiles

Bryce glances over to a boy with bleached hair sitting on the opposite side of the room. "Should we invite Standall?"

Monty makes a face "What?! That homo? Fuck no!"

"He's not gay!" Zach Dempsey States

"What, did you make a move and he turned you down?" Monty laughs

"He's dating Jessica Davis, asshole"

"He dumped her" Justin Foley Buts in

"Really?" Bryce looks at him with surprised eyes

"Yeah, apparently she wouldn't put out" Justin answers.

"Hmm, I think we should invite him" Bryce glances back over to Alex.

This really annoyed Monty, the guys had a tight unit and someone new, who isn't even on any sports team, ruins that. But the truth is, it's more than that and De la Cruz knows that.

Alex Standall was pretty much a loner, he mostly kept himself to himself and for a while was hanging about with Hannah Baker and Jessica Davis until he and Jessica started dating and it got a little messy and complicated. He's sitting on the couch in Bryce's pool house. He's staring at the flat screen tv on the wall, watching Justin and Zach playing some shooting game. Monty finds himself stealing little glances over to him, no one noticed; he was good at being discreet.

An hour or so goes by, Justin and Bryce leave the pool house to go to the mail house and Zach rushes off as soon as his mom calls him. Leaving Monty and Alex alone together.

Monty plants himself on the couch next to the blonde teen and grabs the extra gaming controller on the coffee table. He acts like Alex isn't even there.

"Montgomery right?" Alex finally speaks up

"Everyone just calls me Monty" His eyes still locked on the TV

"You play football right? With Zach and Justin?"

"And baseball" he gloats

"Cool" Alex's expression shows he's trying to find another topic to talk about but nothing comes to mind

"You?" the dark haired teen speaks after five minutes of silence.

"Oh, no. I don't play sports"

Monty nods, he already knows this

"I'm in band though"

Monty laughs "Dude that's gay"

Alex didn't share the football players humour "Well, I like it"

The dark haired teen finds himself staring at Alex. He starts off staring at his green eyes and works down to his nose, his sharp cheekbones and then to his lips, his lips...

Alex can feel Monty's eyes on him, making his cheeks feeling flushed and red. Alex's eyes turn to Monty, staring into his beautiful brown eyes. As they keep looking at one another there seems to be now an intense feeling around them. Neither of them looks away.

Monty jumps at the sound of Bryce's voice coming from outside. The jock's face now locked on to the computer game.

"What you two homos doing?" Bryce mocks them as he laughs

"Fuck you!" Monty spits out. He knows deep down it was just a joke, but the words stung and it made him unconfutable.

Alex left not long after that and the rest of the night was spent drinking large amounts of alcohol and smoking weed.

Monty arrives home just after two in the morning. As he quietly creeps into the front lounge, he is startled by the dark shadow of his father sitting in his favourite chair. He has a beer can in his hand, staring instantly at it, not even looking up at his son standing in the door frame.

"Where the fuck have you been?" his father spits through gritted teeth.

"Just at Bryce's"

"Just at Bryce's" he mocks his sons words "just at Bryce's?!" he repeats this multiple times, each time his voice gets louder. "JUST AT BRYCES?!" he throws the empty beer cans that are sitting on the coffee table, the cans fly across the room, hitting one on his sons face. Monty covers his eye, now stinging from the metal ring of the can planting on his face.

"Fuck! My eye!" Monty cries out

"Aw, you going to cry now? Like a little girl, grow some balls you fucking little shit!"

Monty runs upstairs to the bathroom; he locks the door soon as he enters, just in case his father decides he's not finished with him yet, although it hasn't stopped him before.

He stares at himself in the mirror, his eye is already swollen and has a red ring around it, and blood was starting to leak out of the cut. He runs the cold tap from the sink and grabs a face cloth from the towel rack. Once he has wet the cloth, he places it on his eye; he flinches as the coldness hits the opened wound. He can hear his father shouting downstairs, although it's not quite clear what he is saying, Monty has a good guess though. He stares himself in the mirror, wishing to be someone else, anyone else. He doesn't want to be who he is, he wants the feelings that he feels about the same sex to go away. Why was he like this? Why couldn't he be like Justin or Bryce? Why didn't his father love him like a father should? He sobs quietly to himself in the bathroom, wishing he was dead.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language.**

Montgomery parks in the school's parking lot. He adjusts the mirror, staring at the large bruise around his eye. He lets out a big sigh. He knows no one is going to give a shit when they see it, his buddies were used to him showing up with new cuts and bruises all over him. Everyone knew his father beats him but they just don't care about it. His team mates just stare at him awkwardly and move on. He wishes just one person, just one person on this planet cared but he wasn't holding his breath.

He gets out his car and heads towards Bryce and the rest of guys; they are standing at the main entrance of the school. Monty greets them by giving them a nod; they all stare at him, making him bow down his head.

"You gotta lay off that whiskey" Bryce states and he gently taps his stomach.

Monty smiles. In a way he's glad they don't make a big deal about it but he still wishes someone gave a shit.

After Lunch, Monty goes to the school library; he has a study period on Thursday afternoons which means he's stuck in the library all by himself. He places his bag on the desk and takes out his school books; he stares at the same page for ten minutes not really paying attention to it. He notices a figure standing next to the chair beside him, he looks up and sees Alex. The bleached blonde teen places his bag on the desk and rummages through it looking for a specific textbook, once he finds it he sits down next to the jock.

"Hey" Alex greets

"Hey" Monty looks up at him.

Alex notices the deep purple bruise around his eye. "Shit! What the hell happened!" he felt the need to reach his hand out and touch him, but he knows that won't end well.

"Got shit faced after you left" He laughs but it was fake.

Alex knows it didn't happen because he had a little bit too much to drink last night. Everyone knows what happens to Monty.

"As long as you're ok" Alex glances him a smile, it was heartfelt and sympathetic. Something he really wasn't use to.

He smiles back, getting lost in the moment for a second; he quickly snaps out of it and pretends to read his textbook.

After half an hour of silence, Alex decides to break it "Do you maybe want to go to the Crestmont after school? If you're not doing anything that is"

This left Monty speechless "Um, just us two?" his voice suddenly in a whisper, so no one can hear them.

"Yeah, I mean, I can invite Justin and Zach if you want?"

"Um, no, it's cool"

"Get you at the parking lot after school then?"

"Could we just meet there? A bit later, like six? I have to go home first"

"Yeah sure" Alex smiles

Monty doesn't share the smile, he starts to feel uneasy, but not sure why, I mean they are just friends right?

The baseball player enters his home, he can smell his mother's cooking filling up the entire house. He heads up to his room and places his school stuff on his bed. After he showers, he changes into a blue flannel shirt, he sighs at how grubby it looks, it looks worn out, and he doesn't exactly get new clothes. He fixes his hair and gives himself one more glance in the mirror before heading down stairs.

He enters the kitchen to find his mother standing in front of the stove,

"You look nice" she smiles as she looks at her son

"Just heading out to see the guys"

"You not staying for dinner?" her face saddens.

"I'm meeting Bryce at six" he moans

"You know _he_ hates it when you miss dinner"

"He hates it when I breathe mom"

She doesn't respond she gives her son a longing look; wishing things could be different for her and her son.

"Just be home early, please" she begs

His face softens "ok" he kisses his mother on the cheek and heads out the door.

Monty walks up to the entrance of the Crestmont, he spots Alex right away. His hair is extra spikey than usual and he has also decided to wear a shirt. _Is this a date?_ Monty thinks to himself, making him anxious and excited at the same time.

"Hey" Alex greets him with a smile

"Sup" the brown haired teen looks at the ground as he says that.

"So, what do you want to go see?"

"I'm not sure what's even on" Monty laughs nervously

"Well, there's that new action movie that just came out"

Monty looks at the showings just next to the ticket office. His face lights up. "Holy shit, Harold and Maude is playing"

Alex now has a surprising look on his face.

Monty notices it "what?"

"Nothing, I just didn't pin you down as the old classics type of guy"

"What kind of guy did you think I was?"

"I don't know" Alex laughs nervously "Dyane Johnson, Bruce Willis type of movies, blowing shit up"

Monty laughs "Blowing shit up?" he laughs again

"Harold and Maude it is then" Alex smiles.

Hannah Baker is at the ticket booth; she gives Alex a cold look and doesn't interact with him.

"What the fuck is her problem?" the basketball player asks as they head into the theatre.

"Oh she's still pissed over the whole Jessica and list thing"

"The list! Shit I remember that!" he laughs.

"How good is that movie?" Monty beamed with excitement

Alex was quite shocked at seeing this side of the jock, he seems so carefree and happy, and a side of him he clearly never saw before

"Yeah, it was pretty good" he smiles "I still can't believe you like old movies" he says with amusement.

"Oh that's right, I'm just a dumb jock that likes to watch shit getting blown up" he mocks

"Sorry, I just like this side of you that's all" Alex gazes into his eyes.

Monty gives him the gaze back until he finally snaps out of it "So, what's the deal with you and Jessica anyways?"

"She hates me, I made that fucking list and now she won't talk to me" he rolls his eyes.

"You want her back?" Monty asks with curious eyes.

"It's complicated, I mean she was my best friend and before I knew it we were dating and it just got very complicated"

"I get you, bitches are crazy"

"Bitches are crazy, seriously?!" Alex finds himself offended by that comment, he was starting to see the real him and just like that dickhead Monty was back.

"Shit, I didn't mean-"His face was sympathetic and as he was about to explain he notices Bryce's car park up to the side walk.

Bryce walker rolls down his car window, he has a grin on his face "What the fuck you two doing? Looks nice and cosy"

Monty can hear Bryce and some of the other teammates in the car snickering.

Monty laughs "Fuck you guys, I just ran into him going to the drug store for my mom"

"Ditch the pharmacy and come out with us, we're going to grab a couple of forty's"

"Nice!" Monty grins.

He Jumps in the car without even saying bye to Alex, leaving him on the sidewalk feeling like an idiot.

As the car drives off, Monty's face changes, he shows sadness and regret, he looks back out the window, Alex now walking away. He knows that was an asshole thing to do but what could he do? He knows he can't have what he wants, what he's longing for. But for a few hours, he had been the happiest he's ever been…


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language.**

Monday morning, Monty is lying awake in his bed, hearing the loud voices coming from downstairs, it was a ritual in this household to be woken up to someone screaming and shouting. His mother apparently didn't make the breakfast the way his father likes it and its caused uproar. Monty knows if he goes down the now, he will get it just as his mother is just now. It doesn't matter what he says nor does, his dad will always make an excuse of taking it out on him.

The weekend was kind of a blur with a mix of alcohol and drug use. He spent the entire weekend at Bryce's. He loves when the walker family go on business trips or last minute holiday breaks, means party central. His teammates were pressuring him to hook up with someone at the party, Monty is good at hiding who he is but it was starting to show how less interested he was getting to hook up with girls. He met a girl named Amber, she doesn't go to Liberty, and she goes to the fancy rich private school. Which Monty and the rest of the team are competitors with their boys' sports teams.

She seemed nice enough, her dry sense of humour kept him interested for a while. He is only interested in the same sex but he could appreciate her beauty. Long blonde hair that glowed gold in the sun, her face with soft features and a smile that can light up an entire room and her long legs that can go on for days.

They spent most of the night outside at the pool talking about the differences between their schools but Monty talked about football and baseball, which Amber just pretended to be interested in.

The night was coming to an end, most of the guests had left, only a few left lying in the lounge talking lot rubbish about pointless things. Monty and Amber found themselves in one of the guest rooms in the walker mansion. The second the bedroom door closed, Amber had thrown her arms around his neck, kissing him instantly, Monty is taken aback from this and pulls away "Woah, Take it slow" he smiles in confidence.

Amber's face now in doubt "You don't want to?"

"I do" he looks her up and down "believe me, I do" he lied

"Then what's the problem?" She didn't wait for an answer; her arms were back around his neck and starts kissing him again. This time he doesn't pull away and kisses her back. He pull her body into his and pulls her up onto him, her legs wrapped around his waist, the move towards the bed, she was full of passion and so eager to be with him but Monty was just not feeling it and it made him feel like a freak.

They lay in the bed, the bed sheets covering their naked bodies. Amber's face was dissatisfied; the footballers face was full of anger, angry at him.

"Are you ok?" Amber asked him

"Yeah, sorry, must had a lot to drink" there was no emotion in his words as he laid there not making eye contact.

"Dude its ok, I get it" she stated as she sits up to put her clothes back on

"You get what?" his words came out harsher than it was supposed to be.

"You're just not into me, it's cool"

"I am!" He says in protest.

But Amber could see through it. Her face becomes sympathetic towards the jock, "Hey, you know there's nothing wrong with you right? You don't need to do this to prove a point"

Annoyance now on his face "What are you on about?" he now sits up putting back on his t-shirt.

"My best friend is gay, it's no big deal"

Those words stung right through him, rage now overpowering him "Gay? You think I'm a fucking homo? What because I didn't want to bang you?!"

She goes closer to him, places her hand on his cheek and tried to calm down "Hey" she moves his head towards her, so his eyes were locked on hers. "There's nothing wrong with it, it's who you are, and you can't change it"

His eyes filled up with water, he couldn't keep it in any longer and finds himself breaking down, resulting in uncontrollable sobbing. Amber embraces him and holds him close to her, reassuring that he's ok.

They talked into the early hours of the morning, he had opened up to her about everything and all the pressures he is under, she didn't judge or make fun of them, but he had to know that she wouldn't tell anyone and she kept that promise. They exchanged numbers and she stated that he could call her anytime, just to talk or even for just some company. She really understood what he was going through.

Monty finally gets out of bed when he hears his father has left for work, once showered and changed he heads to school.

He's walking down the halls with a few of his buddies, when he glances at Tyler down at his locker, lurking at him. "What you looking at freak?" he growls at the boy, stopping his tracks and now inches away from Tyler. "Hmm, what you looking at?" he asks again. Tyler looking down at the floor, terrified of the Jocks rage. His friends giggling in the background.

"I wasn't looking at you" Tyler's words almost a whisper.

Monty looks at him in disgust "Fucking weirdo" he pushes the teen up against the locker, the boys skinny frame hits the lockers hard, making him groan in pain. They laugh at him as they walk away.

After lunch, Monty heads to his English class, he has missed the bell but this doesn't give him any motivation to get their faster. As he walks through the empty halls of the school, he spots Alex walking towards him, the bleached blonde teen, ignores him as he walks past.

"Hey" Monty greets him.

Alex stops and turns around facing the jock. "What is it?" Annoyance in his voice.

"Nothing, I was just saying hey, you didn't come to the party on Saturday"

"I had better things to do" Alex snaps

"What the fuck is your problem?"

"What's my problem? What the fuck is my problem Monty?" His voice getting louder " My problem is you ditched me on Thursday, leaving me there, looking like an asshole"

The baseball player's face softens. "Look I'm sorry about that"

"Why did you lie?" Alex demands

"What you talking about? I didn't lie"

"You said we just bumped into each other, why didn't you just say we were at the Crestmont?"

Monty had no idea to explain it to him.

Alex sighs "It doesn't even matter; you're a dick and will always be a dick"

"You really think that of me?"

"Well, it's pretty obvious Monty; you don't give a shit about anyone but yourself and your precious jock reputation"

"You know nothing about me"

"No? I heard what you did to Tyler" Monty doesn't say anything; he hangs his head down like he was ashamed.

"What the fuck is wrong with you Monty?" Alex doesn't wait for a response, he turns around back to the direction he was going and walks away. Leaving Monty feeling like an asshole and he wasn't wrong about that.

Justin and Zach walk Monty to his car once school finishes. The interaction with Alex still playing on his mind.

"Who IS that?!" Zach states

Monty looks up and sees Amber standing next to his car. Confusion now on his face.

"What are you doing here?!" He asks.

"I thought I'd surprise you" she walks over to him and plants a kiss on his cheek. Leaving his friends stunned and amused. "I was hoping you'd join me at the mall and maybe dinner afterwards" she smiles.

He looks at his buddies, who have beaming grins on their faces. "Uh, yeah, sure. That sounds fun" Amber grabs his hand and walks him towards her car. Justin and Zach mock him behind his back, resulting Monty giving them the finger.

"What are you really doing her?" he asks once he gets in her car.

She grins "What? I thought we were friends now, I mean pouring our hearts to one another about our fucked up shit, doesn't make us friends now?"

"No, it does, but you made it look like we were, you know together"

"Well, isn't that what you want? You said you can't be who you are and this is less pressure on you right?"

He liked this idea but he was still confused to why. "Ok, but why do you care so much? I mean, why me?"

Her face hardens "Because Monty, I can tell you don't have any friends, not real ones, ones that actually give a shit about you and I think you need that"

He just smiles. He's never had this before, someone who actually cares for him, it felt nice.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language.**

A few weeks have passed; Monty has been spending most of his free time with his pretend girlfriend, Amber. He feels like a fraud but he is enjoying this new friendship, he can be his self around her, he feels free. They spend most of the time shopping, well Amber shopping. She does tend to buy him clothes though, which makes him feel uncomfortable but he knows she does it because she cares. He likes her and likes spending time with her but it has put a strain on his friendship with the guys, Bryce mostly. They have teased and mocked him for spending so much time with her and not hanging out with them, he had missed a few parties and Bryce thinks that's unacceptable.

Monty sits down at their regular table in the cafeteria, placing his lunch tray on the table.

"Can I help you?" Bryce asks with a serious tone

Monty just looks at him in confusion.

"Shouldn't you be with your girlfriend? I mean, only time we see you now is at practise" Bryce's face still straight.

"Oh don't start man; she has me dragging her about all the time"

Bryce and the rest of players burst out laughing "Price to pay just to get laid my friend" Bryce grins. "But you're coming to my party this weekend, no excuses, bring her along"

Monty nods with agreement but he knew bringing Amber wouldn't be a good idea, he knows what his teammates are like and they would just end up embarrassing him and themselves.

The brown haired teen heads to the library for his study period, he walks in to see Alex and Tyler sitting together with their heads in the textbooks. He slowly walks over to them. Tyler flinches at the sight of him, thinking something is going to happen. Alex looks up at him, his face emotionless.

"What do you want?" Alex moans

"Um, I actually want to talk to Tyler"

Both of the boy look at one another thinking if they were in an alternate universe.

Monty leans on the desk, moving his body towards Tyler "Look man, I know its way overdue but I am sorry for shoving you into that locker and for the other times I've been asshole, you don't deserve that"

"It's ok" Tyler states not sure how to handle what is happening.

"No, it's not ok, he's an asshole" Alex looks at Money straight in the eyes "Your words don't mean shit"

"Your right, they don't but I just wanted to let you know" his eyes now on Tyler "That I am sorry"

Tyler nods, but still shows no sympathy towards the jock. Monty leaves their desk and goes to find and empty table to study. He sits down and opens up his textbook, his eyes wonder over to Alex, who is already staring at him. Monty gestures a smile, but Alex doesn't respond. He wants to apologise to Alex but he couldn't do it in public not with everyone starting to question why he was apologising.

Once practise is over, Monty heads to the parking lot to his car, surprised look on his face now as he sees Standall leaning against it. He sighs at the thought of him telling him once again how much of a dick he is.

"What do you want?" the dark haired man moans

"Why did you do that? Why did you apologise to him?"

Monty laughs with frustration "Are you fucking kidding me? I just can't get it right can I? I'm a dick either way" he sighs as he opens the backseat door to stick his gym bag in

"It's just not like you, that's all"

He has had enough "What isn't' like me, Alex? You don't know shit about me, what you think we hang out once you have me all figured out?"

"No but-"

"But what? Look man, I'm just trying to survive alright? This town, this school, my dad, you just don't get it"

"I do get it" Alex tries to sympathise

"Really? What pressure are you under Alex? Does your dad beat the shit out of you just for looking at his direction? Do your friends pressure you to be someone you're not? That you despise the person you are around them? No, I don't think so" he scoffs. "I bet when you get home, your parents want to hear about your day, they want to know about your life" His voice starts to break, his eyes now tearing up "I bet they wouldn't give a fuck if you were-"

He stops what he is saying and wipes the tears that are now running down his face.

"No, they don't but that doesn't mean you still have to hide"

Monty laughs "do you not go to this school?"

"Fuck them Monty, you shouldn't care what they think"

"I feel like I'm drowning" his voice starts to break again

"Do you want to go to Monet's? We can talk properly there.

"No, I can't. I got to get home" he lied. He's afraid that someone from the team sees them and starts asking questions like before.

"Ok" Alex nods. "I'm here if you want to talk, you know"

"Yeah, I know"

Alex places his hand on Monty's shoulder to show him support, but Monty quickly brushes it off "I gotta go"

Alex smiles half heartily and walks towards his car. Monty watches him leave. It feels good for him to get that all off of his chest but a part of him wishes he hadn't said anything at all.

The weekend has come and Monty is getting ready to go to the walker mansion for the latest party. He decides to wear the sky blue polo shirt Amber got him from Ralph Lauran. He grabs some hair gel and styles his hair. He walks down the stairs and sees his sad sitting in his chair in the lounge on his fifth beer by the looks of it.

"What the fuck is that you're wearing?" his dad states in disgust

"It's just a shirt Amber got me"

"Oh, your bitch picking out your clothes for you now? What, are we not good enough for you now?"

Monty doesn't respond, which angers his father even more. Mr De la Cruz rushes out of his chair and now just inches away from his sons face "Answer me you fucking cock!" spit flying out his gritted teeth.

"Yes, you're good enough" he says with his jaw clenched shut

"Fucking Pansy!" his dad scoffs as he walks back his chair.

Monty glances over to his mother who is standing in the frame of the kitchen; he face is full of sadness.

The party was just your typical party at Bryce's. Everyone drunk and coked out their heads. Jocks and the cheerleaders in the pool making out. All of Bryce's rich douchebag friends snorting white powder in the Livingroom. Just a normal day in the life of Bryce Walker.

Monty pushes past all the drunken students out his way, clutching on to Amber's hand. They head to the kitchen were most of his friends.

"Monty!" A drunken Zach Dempsey shouts.

Bryce walks up to his friend and claps his hand as he pulls him into his Husky frame. Bryce's eyes are now fixed on the blonde standing next to his friend.

"You must be Amber" Bryce smiles in a charming way, he grabs her hand gently places his lips on it.

She quickly grabs her hand back and puts on a fake smile. She barely knew Bryce but her instincts tell her to stay away, all that charm doesn't fool her.

Alex walks by them; Bryce grabs his shirt and brings him back, so he is standing with the three of him. "Hey Standall, have you met Monty's girlfriend, Amber" Bryce grins.

Alex expression says it all; he is confused, shocked and gutted all at once. "Hey, Nice to meet you"

Amber smiles at the bleached haired boy in front of her but she isn't stupid, she can feel the tension between the two boys.

"Shall we go get a drink?" Amber asks, pulling Monty away from the other guys.

The night is going well; Amber and Monty are with Justin and Zach in the kitchen, drinking around the table.

"I cannot wait for summer" Zach says trying not to slur his words

"Says you, you don't have summer school" Justin moans.

Zach burst out laughing making fun of his friends.

"What are the big plans then, for summer?" Amber asks as she sips her beer out of the red plastic cup

"Fuck knows, but I know it involve school" the Dempsey boy laughs again at Justin. His eyes now on Amber, as he tries to keep his head up "What about you?"

"Not much I don't think, my parents are going to Italy for the summer"

"And you're not going, why?" Justin asks, he's baffled to why she would stay here

"Hmm, eight weeks of listening to my parents bicker of antiques or having the entire house to myself, such a tough call"

Justin smirks "party at yours then?"

She laughs "maybe" her eyes drift to Monty.

Monty knows how lucky he has someone like Amber in his life, she was a sweet down to earth girl who for someone reason though he was worth something, it was a nice feeling but he still couldn't help but feel like a fraud. He notices Alex staring at him. He has no clue what's going on with him and Alex. They only really hung out once but he feels like he connected with him and it was clear Alex feels the same or he wouldn't have had that conversation with him in the parking lot. But how can he get involved with someone in this town without anyone knowing? Is it even possible? Will he just stay lonely and alone until he finally leaves this town for college, if he even gets into college? He has to get away from this place, he feels like he's suffocating here. Will he ever finally get to breathe?


	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language. This chapter has sexual content. **

The weeks leading up summer vacation was a tough one for the football player. His father had a massive heart attack in the early hours of the morning, his mother was sound asleep in her bed and Monty had been out with the guys. He quietly unlocked the front door and shut it behind him, he was about to head straight up to his room, when he saw his father's shadow on the chair, he waited for him to make his hostile remarks, but it never came. At first he thought the prick just passed out after drinking himself to sleep. As he stared at the shadow more closely, he could feel something wasn't right, the house was way too quiet; you could hear a pin drop. He slowly walked into the lounge, he called out for his dad, but there was no response. The light of a car driving by shined through the window showing his dads emotionless body, his eyes still opened. Monty screamed out for his mother until she finally ran down the stairs, her screams echoed through his ears, she quickly pulled out his cell phone to call for an ambulance.

The funeral was family only, with a few of his father's work mates, a few of Monty's friends and Amber. She held onto him throughout the service. He wasn't upset, he wasn't grieving, he was pissed off, pissed off of listening to everyone talk about how great he was, how hard he worked for his family, it was all bullshit and Monty hated it.

A few whiskeys' Bryce brought with him, Monty was hammered, and he was swaying back and forth in his mother living room. One of his father's work mates started talking to him about how much his father loved him and how much he cared for him. This set Monty off. Screaming and balling, telling everyone they are all fucking liars and what a piece of shit his father really was. Bryce had to remove him from the house and took him for a ride to cool him off.

Summer vacation was finally here. The De la Cruz family are starting to adjust their lives without Mr De la Cruz. His mother is still struggling but for Monty, it feels like he can breathe a little more, he's not in constant fear of pissing off his dad anymore, it felt great.

The third day into the summer, Amber has convinced him to hang out at her friend's house for the day, just a small gathering of her closes friends. He's not really keen on going but it beats sitting around the house by himself all day. Justin is in summer school, Bryce is visiting his parents for a few weeks at their vacation home in France and Zach, well Zach hasn't been seen or heard of since just before summer started. Everyone reckons he has some secret girlfriend no one knows about. So it's just Monty on his own. Well apart from Amber.

Amber parks in the driveway of her friend's house. As they get out of the car, Monty is in awe of the mansion that's in front of him. He thought Amber and Bryce's houses were big, nothing compares to this house. "Your friend lives here?"

"Yeah" she smiles

"Fuck, are his parents in the mob?"

She bursts into laughter. "Come on" she grabs his arm and pulls him up towards the main door.

"Hey" Amber greets her friends as they enter the house. Her four friends are sitting in the living room, all four of them on the perfectly clean white sofa.

"Guys this is Montgomery"

"Monty is just fine" he nods his head

"Monty, this is Gretchen, Leah, Poppy and Winston"

Winston stares at the football player, giving him a wide open smile, showing off his perfect white teeth.

Monty felt an instant attraction over Winston. He's flawlessly good looking, messy black hair, thin figured frame and a smile to die for. He feels like he's connected with him already.

Monty is in the kitchen fixing him and Amber a drink. He turns round and jumps at the sight on Winston standing there. "Sorry, didn't mean to scare you"

Monty laughs nervously "Nah, you didn't"

Winston stares at the boy in front of him, his curious eyes locked on the teens face. You can say he shares Monty's attraction.

"I'm sorry to hear about your father, um, Amber told me"

"Don't be, I'm not"

Winston doesn't know how to respond to that and awkwardly looks down at his shoes.

Monty sighs "Your Amber's best friend right?" he vaguely remembers her saying she has a best friend who is gay.

"Yeah, that's right, well was her best friend, it seems I've been replaced" He grins

"We just hang out sometimes" Monty nods.

"Yeah, she mentioned that"

Monty wonders what else she has mentioned.

"The girls are leaving soon, something about sexy laundry for Poppy and her muscle meat head of a boyfriend; you can hang out here if you want until Amber comes back?"

Monty is starting to feel a little flustered. "Uh, yeah sure. I'm down with that"

He nervously grabs the cups of soda and heads to the living room.

As Amber is getting ready to leave with her girlfriends, she states that she can just stay here with him if he wasn't comfortable being alone with a stranger. He reassures he will be fine, they probably just get high and listen to some music. She knows this is a lie, but she pretends to believe him.

Winston states he's going to go up to his room to bring down his record collection to on some music, Monty suggests that he will just come up with him, saving to bring down all his records, Winston didn't object.

Monty looks around his room, stunned at how grown up and tidy it is. His room was a pig sty. Winston standing in the middle of his room can't seem to keep his eyes off of the jock. Monty can feel his heart beat pumping through his chest, he's never felt this nervous before, he intensely stares back, feeling like his whole body can't move. Winston walks past him to shut the door behind him. Monty turns round to face him, his eyes still locked on him.

Winston now just inches away from his face, stares into the jocks brown eyes, he can tell he is nervous and has a feeling the boy hasn't done this before. His face now so close to his, Monty could feel his breath on him, Winston's lips touches his, at first Monty is taken aback and pushes him away, he stares into his eyes, places his hand on his head and pushes him towards him, kissing him back, the kiss is aggressive and rough, Monty hasn't had much experience when it comes to kissing. The kiss lasts for serval minutes, Monty finally letting go and embraces it. His hand still on Winston's head, grips on to his hair and pulls his body down to the floor, so Winston would be on his knees. He quickly pulls down his jeans and boxers, Winston looks up at him with a grin on face, and Monty pulls his hair and pushes him closer to his penis. He gasps at the warm feeling of Winston's mouth, his eyes roll to back of his head, and he lets out a grunt and gasps as the feeling of pleasure over powers him...

Once it's over, Monty pulls up his boxers and jeans, he sits on Winston's bed and places his hands over his face, thinking what the hell just happened.

"Are you ok?" Winston asks, he gets up from the floor.

"I bet better go" Monty states

"Didn't Amber drive you?"

"Fuck!" he rubs his face with his hands remembering he doesn't have his car.

"I can drive you home? Or call you an Ubur?"

"Yeah, Ubur thanks"

Winston half smiles "sure"

He sits on the bed next to Monty as he takes out his phone. "Would you want to hang out again?"

"Yeah, I'd like that"

"Cool" Winston leans in, planting a soft kiss on Monty's lips. Monty places his hand on Winston's cheek pulling him more towards him, as he passionately kisses him.

They hear the front door open; Monty quickly stops kissing him and is now standing up. He sighs with relief of Amber's voice coming from downstairs.

Amber parks her car outside Monty's out. The car ride was quiet, the jock not saying a word. As the car stops he stares out the front window, no eye contact on his friend sitting next to him. "Was this a set up? I mean, did you want me to meet him?"

The blonde female's face relaxes, showing a genuine look on her face. "No, it wasn't a set up; I just wanted you to meet people that won't judge you"

"Ok"

"Did something happen between you guys while I was gone?" her eyes now curious.

He doesn't say anything just gives her a look.

"Oh my god, it did!" she grins with excitement "Good for you"

"He won't say anything, will he?"

"No, Monty, he won't" she reassures him.

"I want to say thank you, for being my friend, for giving a shit about me, I don't know where I'd be without you"

"You don't see it do you?"

"See what?"

"How amazing you are"

Monty scoffs

"It's true, once you let those guards down and you're not consumed with hatred and anger, you're beautiful. Remember that"

"I will" it feels so good to hear someone say that about him, he's never heard anyone say anything nice to him, not like that. He feels like he's worth it, that his life is worth living, considering not long ago he thought it didn't, there was a time a few months back were his mind was just full of dark thoughts, he wanted to end it all, all his suffering, all his pain, he wanted it gone. But he was finally healing, the pain and suffering was finally shifting. But would it last? Would something or someone come in the way of that?


	6. Chapter 6

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language. This chapter has sexual content.**

**A/N – I know this fic is a Monty/Alex story. But I want to build up Monty's character up first and I want to build their friendship up inside of just diving them into being together plus I really wanted to write Winston into it ha-ha. Enjoy!**

Monty has spent his first two weeks of summer with Amber and Winston. He would bet so paranoid in case anyone from school would see him with the Hillcrest boy. So they mostly just hung out at Winston's. Amber would be there for a little while then make excuses to leave so the guys could be alone together, she loved helping Monty out and she does consider him a great friend, but she was starting to feel lonely herself, yes it was her idea to play the fake girlfriend but she missed being intimate with someone, connecting with someone. But she didn't want to ruin things for Monty, he was truly different person when he wasn't with that dickhead Bryce.

Monty had sex with a guy for the first time a week ago. He had been with two girls before but that was mostly to impress Bryce and the rest of the team. If they weren't around he wouldn't make any effort what so ever. Amber left 20 minutes after they arrived. Soon as the main door closed, Monty and Winston ran upstairs to his bedroom. Winston closes and locks his door; he turns round to see Monty already with his shirt off. The rich boy smiled. He walks closer to him; places his hand on the back of Monty's head and pulls him into kiss him. The kissing had gotten a lot better, when they had their first kiss, Winston could tell the baseball player had no experience when it came to men and it was true, before Winston, Monty had never been with a guy. It was always on his mine but being where he was and who his dad was, it wasn't an option for him; he had to bury those feelings, which left him miserable and broken. But since meeting Amber and Winston, he was healing, he was beginning to like himself and that was a feeling he didn't want to go away.

As the kissing got more heated and intense, Monty's dick began to get hard, he was so turned on by this beautiful person in front of him, he wanted him, he wanted him badly.

He removed all of Winston's clothes, admiring the sexy body he was looking at, he ran his hands up and down Winston's thin body, kissing his stomach, as he stood back up he pushed Winston on to the bed and turned his body around so he would be lying on his stomach. Winston arched his back and placed his knees on the bed, Once Monty put the condom on, he go on to the bed, place one hand on Winston's shoulder, gripped it tight as he put his penis inside of him, they both gasped with pleasure. He thrusts and pushed his body more and more close to Winston's, He couldn't control how amazing it felt, and let out loud moans, his arms now gripped tight around Winston's arms, he thrusts harder and deeper, Winston groans with pleasure. Monty could feel himself about the explode, his muscular body dripping with sweat, the sounds of Winston moaning, as he got faster, he couldn't control it anymore, he lets out loud grunt as he climax's. He falls to the bed, lying next to Winston. "Holy fuck!" he says as he's gasping for air.

Winston turns to face him, the teen beams a smile showing off his white teeth. He stares that the stunning man next to him. "You ok?"

Monty stares at the ceiling, still trying to catch his breath "That was fucking amazing"

Winston lets out a small laugh. "Yeah, it was"

Monty turns over to face him. His expression changes, more serious now "I'm not gay"

The hillcrest teen smiles "ok" he could see Monty's eyes tearing up "You can be whatever you want to be"

"No" Monty can feel his voice breaking "no, I can't"

Sadness now in Winston's eyes. He knew the jock was risking it all for just being here. He felt so bad for him.

Those first two weeks, he began to see less and less of Amber and more of Winston. The rich teen got sick of spending so much time at his house, so they would go long drives and hangout more in LA, so there was a less of a chance someone they knew would see them. He felt really happy and he was really something he had never experienced before, compassion. He didn't want it to end.

Monty is in his room, getting ready to meet up with Winston, he's excited to see him again, he's starting too really like him, and he can't believe things are going so well for him. As he adjusts his hair in the mirror, he hears his mother shouting his name. He ignores it to start with, but she just continues to shout on him, now frustrated he shouts "what?" back to her. But no answer, he sighs and heads down stairs, as he gets to the bottom of the steps, his face drops.

"Hey buddy"

"Uh, hey man, I thought you were in France for another two days?"

Bryce gives him uneasy smile "I left early, I got back yesterday morning"

"Fuck man!" he goes towards his friend and gives a one armed hug "Good to see you, why didn't call yesterday, I could of came over "he lies, trying to cover up that he was gutted that Bryce was back early.

"Ah, man. I had some things to take care of" Bryce still smiling uneasy. Something didn't feel right; there was this weird atmosphere around him. Monty doesn't know how make of it.

"The boys and I are gonna drive around for a bit then head back to mines, you in?"

"Uh" Monty isn't sure what to say, he's meant to be meeting Winston "I'm supposed to be meeting Amber"

"Aw come on, man. I've not seen my boys in two weeks! I'm sure Amber can go one day without you"

"Yeah, you're right, fuck that bitch!" Monty states, his own words hurting him.

"That's more like it" Bryce smiles as he slaps Monty's back.

After about two hours of driving about and talking shit, the guy's head back to Bryce's house and Hangout at his pool house. Monty keeps looking at his phone, he was two hours late for meeting Winston, he can see the missed calls and texts on his phone, he catches Bryce looking at him, and he quickly puts his phone back in his pocket.

"Monty, come play poker" Bryce's words sounds more like a demand rather than a question.

The dark haired teen gets off the couch and sits around the table with Bryce, Zach and Charlie. Bryce shuffles the cards and deals them in. All seems to be going well, just normal locker room chat, but Monty can feel Bryce's eyes on him, he's starting to feel uncomfortable.

"So, how's the first few weeks of summer been for you?" Bryce asks.

"Uh, yeah alright, been spending it most with Amber, since you pussy's abandoned me!" He jokes, the rest of the jocks laughs, Bryce still looking at him.

"Really?" he asks, while looking at his cards.

"Yeah, man" Monty answers.

"Because I heard you've been running around with some faggot from Hillcrest" Bryce shows a creepy type of smile.

Monty can feel his heart beating so fast out of his chest; he can feel the rest of the guy's eyes on him. He feels like he's about to burst into flames.

He tries to laugh it off "Where'd you here that?"

"I have my sources" Bryce says slyly, like some sort of Villain from a cheesy gangster movie.

"Oh, shit! I know how you're talking about, Amber's friend"

"Amber's friend?" Bryce still keeping his cool, not showing any of emotion.

"Yeah, I met him a few weeks back, thought I'd be nice and hangout with him, keep the girlfriend sweet, you know?"

"Better watch dude, he might try to suck your dick" Charlie states, rest of the guys laugh.

"Fuck you Charlie" Monty spits

"I think it's about time you break up with this chick" Bryce stares intensely at him.

"Wait, what?"

"She's not good for you, man. Makes you hang around with some homo, dresses you like something out of a Ralph Lauran Catalogue, you've lost your balls. It's not you" Bryce looks around the room, pointing the other guys in the room "We're your brothers, we know you better than anyone, it's time to get rid of that bitch"

There's pain behind Monty's eyes, he wants to just stand up and beat the shit out of his so called brother, but he doesn't. "Yeah, maybe you're right"

"Maybe? I am right"

Monty forces out a smile "Yeah"

"Good! Now let's play some fucking poker!"

Soon as he gets home later that night, he rushes to his bedroom slams the door and punches his wall out of anger. He can't fight the tears anymore and lets out a huge howl, he's crying hysterically, he knew it was too good to be true, that somehow something was bound to happen, that he would go back to being miserable and broken again. Why did he let Bryce rule him? Why did this guy have so much control over him? And will he ever be able to break away from him? And finally let himself be happy.

**a/n – Hey guys, could you please leave a review if you can? I have no idea if anyone is enjoying this, so would love to hear your feedback. Thanks.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language. This chapter has offensive violence so there's a trigger warning.**

**A/N – this will be my last update until Thursday. I start back at college tomorrow, so won't have time to update till then. I do hope you're enjoying this and please feel free to leave feedback.**** EDIT - thanks so much for the reviews guys! I see people are enjoying that I have put Winston into the fic..so I'm thinking I may keep him in but I do want Alex in the story to so I might create a love triangle sort of thing with them. Will see how it goes! Thanks again for your feedback!**

Monty is staring at his phone in his hand, as he's sitting in the backseat of Bryce Walker's car. Since he stood Winston up last, he's been dodging Amber and Winston's calls and texts, he doesn't see the point anymore, this is who he is, this what he only knows, he feels like a fool to try and break away from that. He's back to being Bryce's lap dog.

Alex Standall is also sitting in the backseat, the bleached blonde has become good friends with Zach Dempsey, Who also went MIA during the first few weeks of summer which he kept quiet about. The four of them have just been driving around talking shit like always. Bryce has been acting weird with Monty for the past week, a little remark here and there, Monty just brushes them off, and he always does.

"Can't wait for football this season, we're going to crush them" Zach states

"Too fucking right!" Bryce answers as he continues to drive. "So what do you pussy's want to do today? My parents are back for the week, so can't lie about the pool house all day"

"Can see what's on at the Crestmont?" Alex suggests.

"What do you guys think? Crestmont?" Monty and Zach both nod in agreement. "Crestmont it is then"

As they walk towards the Crestmont, Bryce and Zach are walking in front, discussing whose ass they are going to kick on the football field when the season starts back. Leaving Monty and Alex walking behind them.

"Are you ok?" Alex asks with concern in his voice.

"Why do you ask?"

"I don't know, you're not being your obnoxious self" he tries to make a joke; he can see it had no effect on the football player.

"Just have a lot on my mind"

"Like Amber?"

Monty's turns his head round, now in eye contact with Alex "what makes you say that?"

"Heard you guys broke up, just thought you were bumped about it"

Monty can see Bryce now looking at him, as he and Zach wait for them to catch up with them at the ticket "Nah man, fuck that bitch" He says as he walks away from Alex and gets closer to the other two guys.

The movie wasn't that great, well Monty wasn't really paying attention to it, he wasn't lying to Alex when he said he has a lot on his mind, he does. And Standall was right, he wasn't being his normal asshole self. Truth is, he's getting tired of it, he finally felt what is was to be liked, to people who cared and didn't judge him and he's just fucked it all up to be around fucking idiots who wouldn't care if he disappeared. He is also thinking about the times his so called brothers who would mock him for getting abused by his father, calling him names all the time, making him feel worthless, then it clicks to him, he also has done this to people, especially Tyler Down, it makes him feel disgusted with himself, he doesn't want to be this guy anymore.

Monty suggests that he's going to just walk home but Bryce insists he gives him a ride; the jock finally gives in and gets in the car.

The car is pulling up at the sidewalk of Monty's house. "Who the fuck is that?" Zach asks.

Monty looks up, panic now in his eyes, how is he going to explain this?

"Who is that?" Bryce asks.

Monty doesn't say anything, he quickly gets out the car, and the three other guys follow him out.

"What are you doing here?" Monty whispers to Winston, how is standing outside Monty's house.

"I haven't heard from you, I wanted to know if you were ok"

"How'd you find out where I live?!" he demands.

"Amber gave me the address" his eyes drift over to his friends.

"You have to go, now" Monty says through gritted teeth

"Are you ok?" Winston asks with concerned eyes. He places his hand on Monty's shoulder, which is the worst possible thing he could have done.

Panic struck the football player, knowing that Bryce and Zach were right behind him, rage is starting to overpower him, he's got so angry, he's about to explode. He throws Winston's hand off him. "Get off me you dirty little faggot" he snarls. He can hear Bryce laugh behind me him, something just snaps and before he knows it, his fist has just smacked Winston in the face. It doesn't stop with one punch, Monty can't seem to stop, blood now all over Winston's face. He can hear Alex scream from behind him, telling Bryce to do something.

Monty feels arms around him from the back; they give on to him tight and drag him away from the beat up guy on the ground.

"Get in the fucking car and cool off" Bryce demands, his voice calm and steady.

Monty aggressively just in the back seat of his friends car, he punches the seat in front of him in rage.

"What the fuck was that?!" Alex demands as he also enters the car.

"Shut up Alex" Monty snaps back

Alex doesn't say another word, he and Zach just give each other a look, having no clue what's going on. Monty looks out the car window, Bryce's back to them, you couldn't see Winston at all due to his friend's husky frame.

"What is he saying to him?" Alex asks curiously

"Most likely trying to stop him out of pressing charges, you're a fucking idiot Monty" Zach Scoffs.

"Do you want a go Dempsey?!" Monty spits back.

Before Zach can speak, Bryce is now walking back to his friends, Monty watches as Winston gets into his car, not even a glance back at the joke.

"it's sorted" Bryce states as he sits down in the front seat.

"Sorted how?" Alex

"It's just sorted" Bryce turns round, his eyes on Monty "You good?"

"Yeah" Barely the word even comes out his mouth.

"can someone explain to me what the fuck was that about?" Alex now angry

"It's obvious" Bryce stares at Monty intensely at Monty through the car mirror "Asshole here thought the guy was hitting on him and reacted like any of us would"

"I wouldn't" Alex admits

"You a fag Standall?" Bryce asks

"What if I am, Bryce? You going to beat the shit of me to?"

The atmosphere quickly came intense, Monty staring out the window, not sure what to say or do.

"You know what? Fuck this I'm out" Alex gets out of the car

Bryce pulls his car window down. "You live on the other side of town, dumb-ass"

"I'll walk" Alex snarls as he walks away from the car.

"Did he just fucking come out?" Bryce laughs and Zach follows

"Hey, Rocky, you coming to mines to cool off?"

Monty can feel a lump in his throat, he either wants to cry or vomit, or maybe both. What the hell did he just do? He's fucked it royally now. "Nah man, I'm going to go in and ice the hand" He shows off bruised knuckles.

"Sure brother, glad see the old you is back" he smiles.

Monty ignores his words and heads home.

Once the jock cleans up his hand, he lays on his bed, tears streaming down his face. What is wrong with him? Why did he have to do that? To the one person who made him most alive, the one person, he was truly starting to care for just to fuck it all up to impress Bryce and save his reputation, he isn't even sure if he wants that now.


	8. Chapter 8

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language.**

**A/N – ****The next couple of chapters will be more focused on Monty and Alex but don't worry, Winston will be back! Please feel free to leave some feedback! **

_Come here you little fucking shit! I'm going to beat you boy, you little pansy! _Mr De La Cruz is screaming at his son, as he tries to grab him, Monty running as fast as he can around the house, scared that the man that is suppose to love him and protect him, was going to kill him. Monty had left the milk carton left opened in the kitchen and this gave his father the perfect excuse to take his anger out on his twelve year old son. He broke his arm that day.

One of the most stood out memories of his dad was when he was just thirteen. Monty came home from baseball and sat on the couch in the living room, his father sitting on his chair with a beer in one hand, just the usual for him, was watching the news, his son began to watch as well. It was a breaking news story about a teenage boy who was brutally murdered by his classmates because he was homosexual. Something triggered Monty as he was listening to the news caster. He was just starting to realize that he may also be gay, he had this feeling for a while but still confused by it. He watches his father take a sip of his can of beer and leans forward to his son "If you ever turn out to be a faggot, I'll do a lot worse to you than what those little punks did, you got me?" He states through gritted teeth.

Monty doesn't speak, he just gives his father a nod. It was right at that moment, at still a young age, he knew he could never be happy, no one would let him.

Monty's eyes spring open, knocking him out of his daze of past memories to loud noises coming from downstairs, his mother and another female voice, he can't make out the other voice though, he now hears loud foot steps coming upstairs, now coming from the direction of his bedroom, his door now bounces open. He sits up on his bed quickly as he stares at Amber standing in his doorway. Rage all over her face.

"Look! I can explain!" Monty protests.

"You can explain? You can fucking explain why you beat the shit out of my best friend for nothing?!" she screams

"Is he ok?"

She laughs bitterly "Is he ok? You nearly put him in the fucking hospital!"

"It just happened so quickly, Bryce and the guys where there and I just panicked"

" and that gave you the right to smash his face in?" her eyes were now tearing up but from sadness from anger.

"No, why was he here anyways? He knew the risks I was taking"

Amber scoffs "He came here because he was worried about you, he hadn't heard from you, that's what people do when you care about someone"

"I'm fucked up, ok?!" Monty shouts trying to hold in his emotions.

"No, Monty, you're not fucked up. You're just a coward. I could understand when your dad was still alive why you felt the need to keep it all in but he's gone now and you're still doing it"

"You just don't get it" He cries out in frustration

"Bryce?"

His eyes are now focused on her, she was right and he knows it.

"When I met you, I saw this guy who was in a lot of pain, I could see it behind your eyes, you were screaming for help, you had no one and even when I was warned to stay away from you, I just couldn't help it, I wanted to help you, I didn't want you to feel you were nothing, because you're not nothing, the past few months I have seen the real you, the guy who I had met at that party was gone, the hatred you had for yourself was gone but then it hit me, Bryce wasn't there and soon as he comes back you go running to your master and that psycho that everyone told me about came back" she takes a breath, wiping some of hear tears away. "Congrats, Montgomery, you have just lost the two people on this fucking planet that cared about you, don't ever talk to us again"

Monty watches Amber leave his room, he can hear her sob cries as she walks back down the stairs, the front door slamming shut. Monty exhales, gasping for air, he starts to hyperventilate, not being able to fight back his emotions any longer, he screams out in pain. His mother now running up the stairs in a panic, wondering what on earth is going on, she sees her son, sitting on the floor, crying hysterically.

"Montgomery, whats wrong baby? Please tell me" his mother begs as he cradles her son.

"g-gay, I'm gay, mom" he continues son into her shoulder

"ssh, baby it's ok, it's ok" His mother still holding on to her son.

Later that night, Monty decides to go for a walk to clear his head, drained from the events that happened earlier that day. He walks past Monets and spots Alex through the cafe window, he the bleached blonde hair teen was sitting by himself with a strange looking coffee, with loads of whipped cream. The baseball player lets out a sigh and heads into the cafe.

"Can I join you?" Monty asks with a soft tone in his voice.

Sure" Alex not making eye contact at joke.

Monty sits down across from Alex, the jock tries small talk, but doesn't seem to work, he can tell he isn't interested.

"I came out to my mom" Monty whispers.

Alex's head springs up, surprised look on his face "You did? Wow, Montgomery, what did she say?

"She cried, but not for her, for me. She could see how much I was hurting and feels guilty she couldn't protect me, but she's fine with it"

Alex smiles. "That's great"

"I've fucked up so much shit" Sadness in his eyes

"But you can still fix it, not everything that is broken is damaged"

"Yeah, I guess"

"Have you spoken to that guy?"

Pain now in Monty's eyes "No, he wants nothing to do with me, I don't blame him"

"were you two together?"

Monty feels a sharp panic running through him now, he looks around the teen hangout to make sure no kids from school where here, the place was pretty much dead. "yeah, we would just hangout most of the time, he was a really nice guy"

"I'm sorry Monty, I know this isn't easy for you"

"Is it true, that you're also, I mean what you said to Bryce"

"I said that to make a point, I hate that dick" Alex takes a sip of his coffee "I like girls but I also like guys"

"So, You're bisexual?"

"Yeah, I guess I am"

"And your parents know?" Monty asks with curious eyes

"They do, my dad caught me making out with this guy from my old high school in my room"

"shit, what did he do?"

"Nothing, I mean he wasn't thrilled about it but he can't change me, you know? We are who we are"

Monty smiles "Yeah"

"Look, no one can rush you, you come out when you're ready but don't let it stop you because of Bryce, the guy is a dick, you don't need guys like that in your life"

"If I don't have Bryce, then football and baseball will just become a war, they would force to quit not to mention the tings they will say to my face or behind my back"

"Fuck them, who cares? Look at Courtney, look how scared she was to come out and how much she pretended, now, shes happier than ever"

"But she's a girl, it's different with guys, especially if you're in a team"

"Yeah, I suppose but I have your back"

Monty Smiles "Thanks Alex"

Maybe he wasn't alone after all, maybe he can redeem from this, now he's finally admitted who he is, maybe things will be better for him and give him the strength to come out to everyone but he knows the risks and knows what is at stake, is he willing to risk it all? Will his so called friends support him and be there for him? Or would it just get worse for him?


	9. Chapter 9

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language.**

**A/N – ****This will be the last update until the weekend. I have college tomorrow, so wont have time to write or update new chapters. Hope you guys are enjoying this and please feel free to leave feed back!**

The summer is coming to an end, with only one week left until school starts back. Monty has been spending the rest of the summer with Alex. After their talk in Monets, things between them were getting better. They would just hang out at his or Alex's house watching old movies or going to the Crestmont. They would even hang out at the docks from time to time. Monty was starting heal again after what happened between Winston and Amber. He hadn't heard of neither of them and he doesn't expect to, he fucked up on that part but he can start new now, with Alex. The more he was spending with Alex, his feelings for him grew. They had a lot more in common than they thought and Monty felt very comfortable around him, it wasn't the same feelings as he had for Winston, there was no electric chemistry, but there was something and he liked that feeling. Bryce isn't too keen on his friend spending so much time with the Standall teen and tried to nip it in the bud soon as it started, But this time, Monty didn't let him control him, he explained that Alex is a good guy and he's cool to hang with and doesn't see why Bryce would have a problem. Bryce wasn't too sure if he likes this new back bone his buddy now has but he didn't argue with it.

"Are you going to Jess's party this weekend?" Alex asks as he and Monty are playing video games in the Standall household.

"Most likely" he turns his head round eyes locked on Alex. "Are you?"

"I'm not sure, maybe"

"Wouldn't that be weird? Going to your ex-girlfriends party while she is there with her current boyfriend?"

Alex now looking at Monty "I mean, I wasn't thrilled when I heard she's been dating Justin Foley, but I mean we have been over for a while now and we've both moved on"

"You have?" Monty asks curiously, wanting to what the reason why Alex has moved on.

"Yeah, I haven't seen or spoke to her all summer, I guess those feelings just go away"

"Yeah I guess so" Disappointment now in his voice.

"What about you? Have you moved on from, what was his name?"

"Winston" His name still wounds him. "I mean, we weren't exactly boyfriends" Monty makes a face at the way that sounds, like he just eat something disgusting

"So you guys were just hooking up?"

He finds it crazy how casual this conversation is, he still feels a little bit uncomfortable talking about this stuff, but he's getting there.

"sort of" he thinks of his words "I mean, yeah we did, you know but we talked and that"

Alex just nods, now focused on the game he is playing

"Fuck you Standall!" Monty shouts as he playing pushes the bleached blonde guy.

Alex laughs. "Sorry, I didn't mean to kill you"

"Asshole!" Monty laughs with him. They stare at each other longer than they should have, sharing a moment. Alex's eyes staring at Monty's the atmosphere around the room, becoming serious and tense. Monty's breath becoming heavier, he can feel his heart racing. Alex moves closer to him, he is still staring at the baseball player, he leans in towards him, his lips almost touching his, Monty places his hand on his cheek, ready to kiss him, they jump at the sound of the bedroom door opening, Alex quickly moves away, both of them back to focusing on the game.

"Hey guy" Deputy Standall greets. "Montgomery, are you joining us for dinner?"

Monty feeling a little flustered "Um, no, I said to my mom I'd have dinner with her" he lies.

Alex's face shows appointment.

"Oh okay, well we're just getting ready to set up" Alex's dad states.

"Sure, no problem" Monty stands up, he looks down at Alex and lets out a shy smile "I'll see you around"

Alex doesn't respond, he seems a little pissed off about getting interrupted.

The week leading up to Jessica Davis' party, Monty had been dodging Alex's calls and texts, the almost kiss they shared had freaked the baseball player out and the only way he knows how to deal with it, is to hide and his best hiding place? Bryce Walker's house. Although he wishes he wasn't there, all he could hear was how amazing Jessica is. Justin and Jessica became close during summer school and have been a thing ever since. All the guys were getting sick of hearing it.

"Hey man, you're going to the party this Saturday right?" Zach asks as he bounces onto the couch next to Monty.

"I don't know, man" He's still undecided.

"Of course you're going, everyone is going!" Zach states

That was the problem. He sighs "Yeah, I guess I'll be going"

"Sweet!" Zach grins "Will you help me with the keg and set up it?"

Monty groans "Sure, whatever"

"You never know, you might get laid this weekend" Bryce laugh as do the other guys in the room.

"Yeah, Chloe is going right?" Monty jokes back and Zach bursts into laughter

"Fuck you, Montgomery" Bryce snaps, he's not too happy about that remark.

After hanging out with his team mates, Monty heads home. His mom enters the hall when she hears her son coming through the door.

"Alex was round again" she states, with a disappointing look on her face.

"What did you say?"

"I just told him you where out"

He sighs with relief.

"Did you guys break up?"

"What?!" he shouts louder than it was suppose to "No! I mean, we're- it's not like that!"

"Oh okay, but you want to right?!"

He was starting to feel uneasy "I'm not having this talk with you!" he laughs nervously

"You know you can though" she smiles.

He ignores her and heads up to his bedroom. He still cant believe how cool is mom was being about all of this, but then again she was nothing like her husband. She was a sweet down to earth women, who can be too trusting at times, but when she married Monty's father, she became nothing, a painting in the background that no one noticed. But since her Husband's untimely death, she has found her old self again, she has made friends and actually leaves the house, she got herself a job down at the youth centre to help troubles teenagers. She wants to help kids who went through what Monty went through, she may not had the courage to protect her son but she is making it better by helping others and Her relationship with her son has gotten better but he still has a long way to go but she is a patient women, she will be there for him when he needs her.

It's the night Of Jess' party. Monty and Zach arrive early to set up the kegs. Clay Jensen is the first guest to arrive, being the only one. Jessica isn't even ready yet. Zach and Monty find this amusing.

"Little bit early, aren't you Corey?" Monty asks

Clay gives him this strange look

What?" Monty asks if there's something on his face.

"It's, Clay, uh, my name is Clay"

"Holy shit!, Dude, I'm sorry! Monty feels like a dick "But I've been calling you Corey for-"

"-For three years now" Clay nods awkwardly

"Fuck! Man, 'I'm sorry"

"It's cool"

"No, it's not cool, you can have the first tap of beer!"

"uh, thanks" Clay says sarcastically.

The now part is now lively, as more guests has arrived. The base player is in the kitchen with the rest of his team mates. Hannah Baker just walks in and automatically goes to Clay in the living room. Bryce asks if there's anything going on between the two and Zach states he has no idea, although the words come out harsh and bitter for some reason. Monty glances at the main door, his heart starts to race as Alex walks in. He watches as the bleached blonde teen talks to Jess and Justin, he can feel the awkwardness from here. He now panic, as Alex walks towards the kitchen, Monty quickly removes himself by going out the kitchen door, now in the backyard. Charlie greets him and they go towards the keg. Once the beer cups have been filled, Charlie sees one of his friends and leaves Monty on his own, he glances around outside and spots Hannah Baker sitting on her own.

"Hey" He greets

The long dark haired looks up, her face shows that she's not amused by the jock standing in front of her.

"You enjoying the party?" he asks.

"I was" she answers bitterly.

"I guess I deserve that" He now sits down next to her

"That seat is actually taken" she looks around for someone

"Jensen?" he nods "This wont take long, I just wanted to say I'm sorry for causing you shit with the list and that poem you wrote last year"

Her face softens, she wasn't expecting an a apology, not from Montgomery anyways. "ok" she says, not knowing what to say.

"It was actually a really nice poem, I mean I could relate to some of it"

"How much have you had to drink?" she stares down at his cup

"Not enough, apparently" he jokes. "You should be writing you, you're really good at it"

Hannah smiles, but it was more of a unsure smile, like she wasn't really sure what was happening.

Clay now standing next to them, holding two cups of beer. Clay awkwardly looks at Monty. "I guess that's my cue, you guys have a good night" he says as he gets up.

_What the hell was that?! he hears Jensen's words as he walks away from them, he smiles, finding it amusing._

The night is coming to an end, most guests have already left. Justin and Jess have headed up to her room, Bryce and the rest of the team have left. Monty stumbles out to the backyard, he walks to the keg, disappointed that there's no beer left. He's not drunk, just a little tipsy.

"I think you may have had enough"

His back was turned but he knows exactly whose voice it is. He turns round, and Alex is standing next to the kitchen door. Alex smiles "hey"

"Hey" Monty places his beer up on the ground. He walks towards the bleached haired teen, now just inches apart. "I'm sorry I haven't texted you back"

"It's ok, I get it" Alex stares at his feet, making no eye contact.

"You get what?" Monty now curious

"That you're just not interested" Alex still looking at the ground

Monty sighs, he couldn't be more wrong. The jock places his hand on Alex's jawline, tilting his head up, so they were both looking at one another, Monty's brown eyes stare at Alex. His hand moves to the back of his head, pulls him and kisses him softly on the lips. Alex kisses back, the longer the kiss last, the more hotter it gets, Monty can feel Alex's warm tongue in his mouth, he grips tights to Alex's hair. They finally break free, Monty steps back. "Do you want to come back to mines?" Monty asks with hungry eyes.

Alex nods. They now head to Alex's car, not knowing that someone just saw them…


	10. Chapter 10

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****, Sexual content on this chapter.**

**A/N –**** Thank you so much to everyone who let feedback, means so much to me that you guys are enjoying this just as much as I'm enjoying writing it!**

Monty grunts as he's inside Alex, The bleached blonde grips on to the edge of the bed, the jock thrusting from behind. They are trying not to be so loud, but Alex can't help it as he moans at the feeling of Monty inside him. Monty's hand on the back of Alex's neck, he can feel the build up all over his body, with one more deep hard thrust, he comes. He lets out a loud grunt and collapses on to Alex, he rolls off, now lying next to him, both of them gasping for air. Alex reaches for his phone. Monty rolls his eyes, as this was becoming a habit.

"Let me guess, you have to go"

"You know I do, if my dad finds out I sneaking out in the middle of the night, he will kill me" Alex sits up in bed, searching for his clothes.

"It would just be nice for once you don't run off right after"

Alex smiles "You're so cute when you act all sweet" he leans over and kisses Monty on the lips.

"Yeah, don't get use to it" Monty jokes.

Alex gets out of bed and grabs the rest of his things, he puts on his zipper. "see you at you school?"

"Sure" his tone had no emotion.

Alex sits back on the bed and gives the jock one last kiss before he leaves in the early hours of the morning.

They have been seeing each other for a few weeks now, but Monty still wants to keep his distance during school hours, as he's still not ready to come out to the world just yet, he was still getting use to being with someone, it was all new and strange to him. He isn't sure what he and Alex are. They are together, but the word boyfriend made his stomach turn. He is getting better with coming to terms with it and has accepted who he is but he is still Monty, after all.

School started back two weeks ago and football practise has just started. It's the only thing he's excited about at school. It's the only thing that doesn't want to go away if anyone finds out who he is and he knows that it will.

He manages to doze off once Alex had left. His eyes spring open at the sound of his alarm buzzing through his ears, he moans. He was starting to hate the idea of Alex coming to his so late, at first it was exciting and thrilling, but the lack of sleep was finally getting to him. His mother even said to him she doesn't mind if Alex sleeps over from time to time, which he loves her for. He honestly feels like he's living in a different house. He finally manages to get out of bed and heads towards the bathroom to get ready for school.

Monty rushes as he gets to school, he's already missed the first bell. He quickly goes to his locker to get his English textbook, he jumps at the sight of Ryan Shaver in front of him.

"What the fuck do you want?" Monty snarls

Ryan stands there with a curious smile on his face. "I'm writing an article for my magazine and I would like your in put on it"

Monty makes a face "Why me?"

"Because you're in the category of the stereotypical jock and I need that for for the article"

Monty looks at his watch, knowing he's going to miss registration "What's the article" he rolls his eyes.

Ryan grins "It's about toxic masculinity, how males in a specific environment, like sports, feel the need to hide their sexuality and stay in the closet" his voice was sharp.

Monty begins to feel like he's on trial, he covers his panic with aggression. "Andy the fuck you need me?" His body moves closer to the journalist, anger in his eyes. "What you trying to say huh?"

Ryan steps back "I'm not trying to say anything, but seeing the way that you have reacted, I am spot on about this, there is this hatred towards around teenage boys when it comes to sexuality"

"Fuck off faggot, before I do something I know I wont regret" he spits.

Ryan sighs "Once again, proving my point" he walks away.

Monty stares intensely at Ryan as he watches him walk away, too busy in his own imagination, he doesn't realize the halls are now full of students, he jumps at the touch of someones hand on his shoulder, he flinches and turns round as fast he can.

"Wow, easy!" Justin holds his hands up. He can see how wound up Monty looks. "You alright?"

Monty tries to laugh it off "yeah, man it's nothing"

"come on, I'll walk you to English"

Bryce Suggests they go off campus for lunch, most of the other guys agree, Monty was suppose to meet Alex at lunch but with the events of this morning with Ryan, he's having second thoughts.

Bryce takes them to a upper class restaurant, Monty always feel uncomfortable going to these types of places, he always feels like he stands out, like he just doesn't belong there. They all sit around the table, Bryce orders the drinks for everyone. Trying to decide on what to eat, Monty catches a figure at the corner of his eye, he looks up and sees Winston entering the restaurant with a few friends from his private school. Monty suddenly feels his cheeks flustering, his heart beat going a little faster. He can't keep his eyes off him. Winston spots him within seconds, as he walks past with his friends, he gives the jock a look, but the look isn't inviting, it's cold and harsh.

The footballer looks up quickly to see if anyone noticed. But their faces were all stuck in the menus. Monty sighs with relief.

After football practise, Monty heads to the parking lot to his car, he spots Alex standing next to it, walks quickly towards the teen.

"Missed you lunch" Alex states bitterly

Monty sighs "Don't start, I've had the weirdest day"

Alex face now with concern "everything ok?"

"Yeah, I think so, yeah it's all good" he says with doubt.

"Do you want me to come over tonight? I promise I'll say for the whole night"

"What will your dad say?"

"I'll just tell him I have to stay with Tyler to work on a project or something"

Monty smiles "Yeah, okay"

"I'll be at yours for seven"

They look at one another, wanting to give each other a kiss goodbye but knowing they can't, not in public and defiantly not at the school.

Monty paces up and down his room, it's now Nine thirty and still no sign of Alex, his phone clutched to his hand, staring at the unanswered texts he has sent. _Where the fuck is he?!_ he thinks to himself. He goes in to his contacts, taps on Alex's name and calls him, no answer, just rings out until it goes on to voicemail. He sits back on his bed and runs his hands through his hair. Has something happened? Or was he just simply ghosting him? And if he was ignoring him, then why? What would be the reason? Everything was fine when he left him at the parking lot, what has changed since then til now? Monty had other things running through his mind also, the weird altercation with Ryan this morning, what was he getting at? Did he know the secret Monty is keeping? Or was the Jock just simply being paranoid? Something about that just didn't sit right. And lets not forget seeing Winston at lunch. Monty can't seem to get the hatred in the rich teen's eyes. He doesn't blame him, what he did was unforgivable, but it hurt him knowing that Winston hates him, would he ever make it right?

His phone makes a ping noise and he quickly looks at it, disappointment on his face when it was just a text from some advertising company. He throws his phone on to the bed, with only one thought now on his mind, where the hell is Alex?!


	11. Chapter 11

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. Trigger warning, upsetting stuff on this chapter on suicide.**

**A/N –**** If you're enjoying this story please feel free to leave feedback.**

Monty leaves his house as soon as he can. His mother wondering why her son got up so early to go to school, most days it's a struggle to wake him up. He basically runs out the door without saying bye to his mother. He jumps in his car and heads over to Alex's.

He knocks on the Standall's household door, realizing his knock was a lot harsher than it's meant to be. Deputy Standall opens the front door, his coffee mug in one hand.

"Hi Sir, sorry to bother you so early, but is Alex there?"

"No, he's not. He left just about twenty minutes ago, said something about a school project"

_What the hell is going on?_ He thinks to himself. "oh okay, I'll just get him at school then"

The deputy just gives him a nod then shuts the door. Monty gets back in his car and just goes straight to school, surely he can't be anywhere else? Can he?

Monty stands in the parking lot at school next to his car, waiting to see if he can see Alex, the car park was starting to get bust as more students arrive. He now clocks Alex getting out his car on the other side, the Jock rushes over to him.

"What the fuck Alex?" he shouts towards him

Alex doesn't look good at all, his eyes are red and patching like he's been crying all night and had zero sleep. "Look, I'm sorry ok, everything just got fucked up"

"Fucked how? Where have you been?" he demands,

"I was with Jess"

Monty's face drops "You where with Jessica Davis? Why?"

Confusion now on Alex's face "You haven't heard have you?"

"Heard what?!" Frustration now on his face "what the fuck is going on Alex?"

Sadness now on the teens face "Hannah Baker killed herself last night"

Monty suddenly couldn't breathe "what?!"

"Her parents found her in the bath tub, she slit her wrists and bled out"

Monty rubs his face with his hands "Holy fuck!"

"She was my friend and for a while she was my only friend, her and Jess"

No, yeah I get that" Monty's voice softens "I just wish you came to me, I waited for you all night"

"I'm sorry, but I had other things on my mind, Montgomery!" Alex spits.

"Don't take your shit out on me"

"My shit?! yeah that;s right, you didn't give a fuck about Hannah Baker, she was just another kid in this school to torment for you"

Monty could feel a lump in his throat. "Fuck you Alex" The jocks walks away, leaving Alex standing there himself at his car.

The rest of the school day dragged in, everyone was talking about Hannah Baker, the fake kids at the school pretending how upset they are about her sudden death. Most of them hated her or talked about her behind her back. It's like what they say, everyone is your best friend after you die. Monty was emotionless all day, like he was standing still as the rest of the world was moving. At lunch, he's barely touching his food, in his own mind, ignoring everyone around him.

"That hot piece of ass? Such a waste man" Bryce states.

Monty snaps out of his daze to his friends words "What the fuck did you say?"

Bryce gives a confused smile "that Hannah chick, such a waste, she had an incredible ass" the rest of the players laugh

Monty stands up from his seat "What the fuck is wrong with you guys? A girl our age took her own life and your saying that shit?!" you can see the pure anger in his eyes.

"What the fuck, chill man, what's gotten into you? What do you care about Hannah baker?" Bryce asks.

"Where you banging her?" one of the teammates asks as he laughs.

"No, I wasn't banging her! May be am just sick of all this fucking bullshit! A girl is dead and you're making jokes, you really are a sick fuck, Bryce" Monty stares down his friend, until he scoffs and leaves his buddies at the lunch table.

"Who is that guy? That's not our Montgomery" Bryce words echo as Monty leaves the lunch hall.

Walking down the halls, he notices Clay at his walker, he goes over to him.

"Hey Clay" Monty speaks

"Wow, you remembered my name, I'm impressed" Clay says sarcastically

"Look man, I know you and Hannah were close and I just want to say I'm sorry"

Clay's face sadness, he just nods at Monty. Not knowing what else to say.

"Can I ask you something?" Clay speaks up

"Sure, man"

"What is this? You apologize to Tyler, then Hannah and now you're acting like this nice guy trying to make amends? Why?"

"Maybe I just don't want to be high school asshole all my life, maybe I'm just over all the bullshit, you know?"

Clay forces a smile "I hope you keep it up"

Monty skips football practise and waits around for Alex after school, but hes nowhere to be found, he also skipped band practise. He gets that Alex is hurting but he wants to sort out the argument they had this morning, he doesn't want to leave it like that, he wants to sort it.

He looks at his phone and its full of missed calls and texts from Bryce asking where he is. Monty never missed football practise, ever. Not even when his dad broke his arm a couple of times, but he feels that there's more important things right now than football. He sends a text to Alex, the message comes up as read but no reply. This was starting to piss him off.

He gets home, throws his school stuff on his bed. He pulls out his phone and sees he has a text from Alex.

**A - I need some space Monty, ill talk to you later**

**M - I don't want to leave things the way it was this morning**

**A - I can't deal with this right now.**

**M - Can't deal with what?"**

No reply. Monty feels like screaming in frustration. Just as he's about to punch his wall. His mother shouts that someone is hear to see him. He know it couldn't be Alex, unless he has some sort of superhero powers.

"Send them up" he shouts back.

He waits for his guest to enter his room. He now has a surprise look on his face, he wasn't expecting this.

"Dempsey? What you doing here?" Monty asks with a confused tone.

"Um, I heard about your out burst at lunch then you missed football and I just wanted to know if you were ok?"

Monty was still confused to of why Zach was here, I mean they weren't exactly close.

"I'm fine"

"You don't look it dude" Zach states.

"What is it you want? I'm not really in the mood for, whatever this is"

Zach walks around his room, staring at the sports memorabilia around the walls and the trophies on the shelves. "I had a thing with a Hannah"

Monty's face drops "Holy shit, really? Wait, I thought she was with that Jensen kid"

Zach shakes his head "Nah, well not when I was with her"

It was beginning to all click "That's why you disappeared at the start of summer, you were with her!"

"Yeah, it was great, I really liked her"

"Then why did you stop seeing her?" Monty now curious

"Why do you think?" Zach spits out. Monty doesn't answer. "Because I know how much heat and shit I would of gotten if I said anything, I mean the way everyone treated her, I felt like I would have Target on my back, I really liked you know and I was just a fucking coward" Zach shakes his head in disgust with himself.

"Why are you telling me all of this? I mean, we're not really friends, we only hangout because of Bryce"

Zach takes a deep breath. "Because of all I people, I know you will get it"

Monty now on his guard "What are you talking about?"

Zach's face softness "Look, man. I know"

"You know what?"

"I know your gay, I saw you kissing Alex at Jess' party"

Monty could feel the rage and panic bubbling up inside him.

"I'm not going to say anything ok? Like I said, I get"

"What is this, did you just come here to out me?" his voice gets louder

"Chill man! No, I came here because I've kept me seeing Hannah a secret for my own selfish reasons and now that she is dead, I can't make it up to her and the more I thought about how much pain she was in and keeping everything to herself and it made me think of you, I don't want you feeling or going through that man"

"What do you want me to do, Zach?" he raises his voice again. "Come out? Tell everyone I like dick? How do you think that's going play out? You were scared to tell your so called friends that you were dating a girl, how do you think it would go down for me huh? Writing fag on my locker, telling me to leave the lockers room in case I try something, the things they will say to me behind my back? My so call brothers? You have no idea, man and you should, you're around it just as much as i am"

"You can't keep it hidden though, it'll kill you"

"One more year, I have one more year at this place and I'm out of here, new college, new town and new people who don't know me, I can be whoever I want to be there but for now, I'm just surveying and it needs to stay that way"

Zach nods and promises him he'll not say a word to anyone. He's grateful for that.

Once Zach leaves. He is overwhelmed with emotions and not sure how to handle it. He tries calling Alex but just goes straight to voicemail. _Fuck it_ he thinks to himself. He can't sit around his room being ignored all night. He grabs his jacket, phone and car keys and heads out the door.

He find himself driving around for a while, he wants to clear his mind, but there's so much stuff he can't stop thinking about.

Monty finds himself pulling up at a familiar driveway. He knows this isn't a good idea and knows the outcome could be a disaster but he can't help it, he needs to be here, he wants to make things right, he doesn't want to leave things the way that it is, he needs to be here, he needs to see him…..

He


	12. Chapter 12

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. Trigger warning, upsetting stuff on this chapter on suicide.**

**A/N –**** Hope you guys are enjoying this story, please feel free to leave some feedback.**

Monty is standing in the driveway in the dark night, he didn't have to ring the bell, the person he has came to see saw him through the window. Monty is nervous, his heart beating faster, he knows this isn't the best idea he's had, but he needs to see him, with everything going on, he needs to talk to someone and this person was the first one that popped into his mind.

Monty can see his shadow as he opens in the front door of his house, they stand there at first hesitating whether they should walk down to the jock or not.

"What are you doing here? You should go!" the voice in the shadows states.

As he walks closer to Monty, the street lights around them, shines bright on his face.

"Look man, I know you don't want to see me and I don't blame you, I am really sorry"

Winston's face shows no emotions, he stands there with his body straight and arms folded. "Just go Montgomery"

"I was really fucked up and I took everything out on you and I am really sorry" you can hear how sorry he is in the tone of his voice.

"Ok, whatever, let's just forget about it" Winston turns back around and walks towards his house.

"a girl from my school is dead" Monty shouts, his eyes now filling up with tears.

Winston stops suddenly and turns round to face Monty once again. "What?"

"Her name was Hannah Baker, she killed herself last night" he tries to fight back the tears that were already streaming down.

"I'm sorry to hear that"

"I barely knew you here, I mean. I knew of her but I didn't really know her , I actually gave her a lot of shit for a while, shit she didn't deserve" Winston's eyes were fixed on Monty, he stares at him with curiosity, wondering what this has to do with him.

"I didn't know her, but I feel like I am her" his voice now breaking "She clearly was hiding a lot of dark shit in her head, feeling she can't tell anyone that she was in pain and thought the only reason to get rid of that pain was killing herself" Monty rubs the tears from his eyes "You see, for the longest time, I felt like that, I thought about it, I thought about it so fucking much I just couldn't escape it, I even planned it" he laughs nervously.

"Monty-" Winston says his name in a soft tone like, his heart was breaking for the joke.

"No, let me finish ok?"

Winston nods

"I felt like that from the minute I realized I was gay, I didn't want to be, not with a dad like mine not with friends like mine, and the longer those thoughts were there the more I hated myself for it and the more I hated myself the more I wanted myself dead" His eyes now locked to Winston's "But then I met you, you and Amber really, but you, I felt free when I was with you, I could breathe and you were there and I fucked up so much fucking shit, which is all my own fault, but I don't want to be that asshole anymore, I really don't. I just wanted to see you and tell you, what I did was fucked up and I am sorry"

"It's ok, Montgomery, it's ok" Winston smiles

Monty sniffs "I better let you get back to it" He laughs, feeling a little bit silly with himself.

"No, I mean, do yo-do you want to come in? My parents are away for the week, I can make us some coffee?"

Monty is a little surprised, he was waiting for Winston to tell him to fuck off and to never come near him again, but he doesn't, he's kind and understanding. The jock nods and follows Winston into his home.

They spent the rest of the night talking, talking about everything and anything. It was like that day between them never happened. Monty realizes he misses Winston, he misses being around him and misses just talking to him, he can't deny that there's something there between them and the urge to lean over and kiss was there but he uses every strength he has to stop that urge, not until he knows what's going on with Alex.

Monty tells Winston all about Alex. The rich teen shows a disappointed look with sadness in his eyes but all he wants is Monty to be happy and if Alex makes him happy then that's all that matters.

Monty leaves Winston's house around midnight, he gets into his car and pulls out his phone from his letter-man jacket. Six missed calls and seven unread texts from Alex. He lets out a huge sigh. Is it possible to like two guys at the same time?

The next day at school, Alex walks up to Monty in the lunch hall, the jock was surrounded by his sports buddies.

"Can we talk?" Alex voice was sharp, showing no emotion in his eyes

Monty looks at his friends, instead of being the usual ass and saying something cruel or homophobic, the jock puts down his sandwich and gets up.

They walk out of the lunch hall and head outside to the quad. They stop at a quieter place, so there was no one around.

"The fuck Monty?" Alex spits out

"What?" he moans

"I've been trying to get a head of you all night?"

Monty scoffs "that's rich huh? Sounds like me two days ago, trying to get a hold of you"

Alex rolls his eyes "where were you last night?"

"At mine, playing some video game"

"Really? That's funny, because I came by around eleven, and your room was empty" Alex's voice was irritated.

Monty's face is straight, trying not to show he's lying. "fine, I went for a drive, with everything that happened yesterday, I wanted to clear my head"

Alex's face softens "Are we good?"

"I don't Alex, you tell me? You're the one that needs space, remember?"

"Yesterday was a crazy day, I just found out about Hannah and I just couldn't deal"

"But you could deal with Jessica Davis?"

His words stung "She was friend's with her too, Monty"

"Yeah, I get it, it's just funny how you sprout I need to talk things out, I can't keep everything in, I need to talk to you about stuff and then you do the exact same"

"I guess we're both fucked up then" they both laugh, finding amusement in Alex's words. "Can I come over after school?"

"Cant, I have football practise, couch is going to kick my ass because I missed it yesterday, we have our first game next Saturday, so it will be long practise"

Alex feels he was only using this as an excuse. "I can come over tonight?"

"Can we leave it til tomorrow? I didn't sleep so good and I'm going to a mess after this practise today"

"Sure" Alex smiles, but it doesn't touch his eyes.

Monty heads back to the lunch hall, he sits at his usual table with his friends, as he sits down, Bryce Walker asks him why he went away with the Standall teen, Monty makes up some lie about a school thing, but his gut feeling tells him that Bryce can see through his lies. Bryce just smiles and says "sure buddy"

Later that night, the jock is exhausted from football, the lack of sleep and the heavy training is starting to catch up with him, he just wants to fall into his bed and sleep for a week. As he begins to shut his eyes, he hears a tapping sound at his window. His eyes spring back opened, and sees the shadow of Alex outside his window. He jumps out of bed and walks towards the window.

"The fuck Alex?!" he states as he opens it.

Alex climbs in, now standing in his bedroom "I didn't want to leave it like that"

"I said it's fine" he moans

"It's not fine, Monty. I feel like I'm losing you"

The jock rolls his eyes, he's way to tired for this crap. "You're not losing me, Alex"

"Are you sure?" worry in his voice.

"Why are you scared of losing me? I mean, we had a few fights, that's all"

"Because I think I fucking love you, you asshole!" Alex shouts

Monty's eyes widen. His face shows how surprised to hear that "oh"

Alex doesn't say anything else, he stares down at his feet, feeling slightly embarrassed with what he has just said.

Monty grabs Alex's arms and pulls him into his body, he wraps his arms around and hugs him. "We're good ok? Nothing to worry about"

Alex looks up at the jock, he places his lips onto his and kisses him softly, they break away from the kiss, Alex smiles. He knows Monty isn't going to say it back, Monty isn't exactly great when it comes to his feeling, Alex knows this and it doesn't bother him, as long as they are good, is all that matters to him right now.

They are both lying in the Jocks bed, Alex's lying on his chest, trying to keep is eyes open, but he just can't fight back the tiredness, it's been an emotional couple of days for the Standall teen. Monty however, is wide awake. He stares at the ceiling, thinking of Winston. He cares for Alex so much and he has helped him so much with everything, but so has Winston? Everything just seems to be closing in on him, will he finally explode and let it all out? And will he finally make up his mind on what his heart truly wants? When did everything become such a mess…


	13. Chapter 13

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. Offensive violence in this chapter, also has sexual content.**

**A/N –**** Hope you guys are enjoying this story, please feel free to leave some feedback.**

Things with Montgomery and Alex were going good, after the night Alex came to see him, things were getting better and were spending a lot more time together, Monty officially introduced Alex to his mother and Alex came clean to his parents, Deputy Standall was not happy with the choice of who his son is seeing as he knows a little bit too much about the De La Cruz boy. But his parents are quite understanding and they can't stop Alex seeing who he wants to see, even if it's the school psychopath. Monty at first didn't want Alex's parents knowing, he still wasn't out at school and he wants to keep it that way until his senior year is over, but the more people that knew already, the feeling of being caught out any second was less and less going away, he's not as afraid as he once was but he still wants to keep it quiet for the time being.

On Wednesday evening, Monty was invited to have dinner with the Standall family. He wasn't too sure about it and it all felt so strange to him, he may be gay but he's still him. After Alex constantly going on about it, he finally gave in. Bryce had asked him to go over to his to hang out, the way that they use to, but once again the Jock blew him off, this was starting ti piss Bryce off, Monty was his go to guy for everything and the thought of his side kick now breaking away from that, annoyed him. He was starting to see how much the hot headed bully was changing, being nice to Tyler, talking to Clay and lets not forgot the sudden friendship with Alex Standall, he didn't like it one bit.

The dinner was as awkward as Monty knew it was going to be, the dining room atmosphere tense and silent as Alex's parents stared at their food, pushing bits of carrot and mash potato's with their forks. Mrs Standall tries to start up a conversation but falls dead flat as soon as it starts.

"Well, that was fun" Alex states sarcastically as he walks the footballer to the door.

"Oh, yeah, I think me and your dad are going fishing on Sunday" he laughs.

"See you tomorrow at school?" Alex asks.

Monty sighs "Can't, I've got so much practise to do for the came on Saturday, couch as us in between classes and we're skipping lunch" he rolls his eyes.

"Great" Alex moans.

"Can come over later though?"

"Can't" he sighs "I have to do this fucking project thing with Tyler"

Monty laughs. Alex nudges him for laughing at him"

Monty smiles "We'll figure it out" he quickly plants a peck on Alex's lips just before he heads out the door.

It's the night of the first game of the season, they are playing Hillcrest. During the first half of the game, Monty is on the football field, he spots Winston almost instantly, he is standing with the Hillcrest crowd, he has a camera in his hand, taking pictures of the football players. Winston glances over at the joke, he grins. Monty doesn't respond, he turns to get his head back in the game, Bryce now staring at him.

During the half time break, The team heads back to the lockers, for a quick water break. Monty walks in to Bryce and the rest of the team.

"What the fuck was that, Montgomery? You got to keep your head in the game!" Zach states.

"Maybe it's somewhere else" Bryce smiles as he raises his eyebrows.

"The fuck is that suppose to mean?" Monty now closer to Bryce.

"I saw that little Hillcrest faggot out there, ready for found two?" Bryce grins.

This anger Monty, rage now in his eyes, he rushes closer to Bryce and pushes, he pushes him that hard, Bryce stumbles"

"What the fuck Monty?" Bryce shouts

"He's not a faggot!" Monty spits, he walks away back to his locker and picks up his water bottle.

"Oh, what's this? Montgomery defending the homos now?" he laughs before his face turns straight "You really have changed, man"

"Maybe I have" Monty states, his face serious, but his eyes are still kind.

The football couch now enters, telling the team to get ready for the second half of the game, Bryce still gives Monty dirty looks as they walk back to the field.

Once the game heads and everyone changes out of their sports uniform. Monty heads to the parking lot to his car, he was the last one to leave, so he was the only one left at the school. As he's walking, he spots Winston at his car, taking pictures. He's hesitates at first but before he knows it, his legs are walking towards him.

"Hey" Monty greets nervously, he doesn't know why but he's always nervous around him.

"Hey, I'm just shooting pictures for year, I'm in yearbook" Winston rolls his eyes at himself at how stupid that sounds.

"That's cool" Monty nods

"No Alex?"

"He was suppose to be here" he looks around the deserted school "But didn't show"

"oh, okay. I was just going home, um, do you want to hangout? My parents are away, so it'll just be the two of us" Winston was also nervous, his eyes now focused on the ground.

"Uh, yeah. Sure" he knows this wasn't a good idea. But things were good between them now and they were just friends, right?

Monty jumps in his car and follows Winston's blue sports car to his house.

They enter Winston's bedroom, the rich teen closes the door behind the, as he turns round to face the jock, they stare at each other. They can't keep their eyes off of each other. Monty can feel his mouth getting dry, his heart feels like it's going to rip out of his chest and memories of being in this room come flooding back, being here, being with _him._ There is no slow build up, they both rush over to one another, kissing as soon as they are close enough, kissing passionately like they needed each other so badly. As the kissing becomes more and more intense, feeling Winston's soft tongue in his mouth, he quickly removes his jacket and before they know it, all their clothes have come off. Monty pushes Winston to the bed, the rich teen grins. He pushes himself up onto the bed, he turns round now lying on his stomach. Monty leans over him and whispers in his ear "Turn over"

Winston turns over, his back now lying on the bed, Monty grabs a condom out of his wallet, once it's on him, he crawls on to the bed, he leans over, Winston, kissing him hard before he lifts his legs up and inserts his cock into him. Winston Grunts with the feeling of Monty's penis entering him. Monty lies on top of him, his hand now clasping onto Winston's. he grips his hand tight as he thrust back and fourth, moaning louder and louder at the pleasure he is feeling, they share a moment together as they both stare into each others eyes, Monty can't look away, he is in awe of this mans beauty, everything about him is beautiful. As he thrusts harder and deeper, the sounds of pleasure getting louder and louder, Monty can feel his body about to explode as he climax's.

The footballer falls on to the bed while trying to catch his breath. "Holy fuck" he states.

Winston smiles "did you enjoy that?"

"Did I enjoy that? Fuck, that was amazing" he leans over and kisses Winston the lips.

"So, am I your bit of the side now?" he jokes. but his words sting Monty and shoots up from the bed. He completely forgotten about Alex, guilt now overpowers him

"I need to tell him" he looks over at Winston

"Tell him what?" Winston gives him a look, the look was worrying, as he didn't want to know the answer.

"That I want to be with you"

Winston is taken a back by his words "oh" he smiles wide. "ok" he moves over and kisses Monty one more time.

Monty gets in his car, on his way home. He pulls out his phone and sends a text to Alex. **Can we talk? I need to talk to you**.

He pulls up at his side walk, it was so dark out, he could barely see anything other than the small light coming from his living room window. He looks his car door and walks towards his front door, he's just about to put his eyes in when he feels his body being grabbed, he kicks his feet to break away, but whoever has grabbed him, tightens their grip on his arms, making it impossible for him to get away. The mystery person drags Monty to a van, opening the door and throwing into in it. Monty bangs his head in the process.

Sitting in the van wondering what the hell is going on, he can feel the the motion of the van has stopped, complete silence in the air. He jumps at the sound of the van door swinging opened, it's still too dark to make out who this person is. They grab him out of the van and pushes him onto the ground, he looks around, he's at the docks. The lights of city shining down onto to them, he can now make out who this guy is, the mystery man is now surrounded by others, he can make out the Letterman jackets.

"What the fuck Bryce?" Monty screams as he's still on the ground

"Hey buddy" he grins "I thought we'd have a little chat"

Monty eyes go towards most of the football team standing around him "Like this?"

"Well, it's so hard to get a hold of you these days, so thought this was the best way to do it"

"This is fucked up!" Monty shouts

"No" Bryce walks closer to him, he squats down, so he's at eye level "What's fucked is that my so called brother, is keeping things from me"

"What things?" Monty plays stupid

Bryce scoffs, he stretches his body up, now standing straight "why did you go to that faggots house after the game? I mean, yo were in there for a good three hours, I'm actually impressed" the rest of the team laughs.

"What do you want me to say, Bryce?" he spits his words

Bryce grins, showing of a side of evil "I want you to admit it, I want you to tell us, what you are?"

Monty pulls his body up to stand, but the force of one of his team mates hand, pulls him back down to the ground.

"Well? I'm waiting"

There is so much anger in Monty, all he can think about his getting up and bashing Bryce Walkers head in. "What the fuck do you want me to say, Bryce? That I'm gay, your right hand man, is a dick loving, cock sucking faggot" he says through gritted teeth, his jaw clenched tight.

Bryce howls with laughter "see was that so hard?"

The footballer behind Monty, pulls at his body, placing him with his back straight and him kneeling on his knees.

"You know, I should of seen it, I mean the signs were all there, I don't have a problem with homos, I really don't, but you hurt me Monty, you lied to me, you ditched me for some slut and faggot and that hurt my feelings, you were suppose to be my bro, bros don't do that!" His emotions don't change, still standing there, grinning, cool as a cucumber. "If only your daddy can see you now" he laughs again "His only son, a dirty little faggot" he walks over to Monty again, looking down on him. "Maybe we should use the same methods as dear ole daddy did and knock the queer out of you" Bryce stares down at him, he looks at the footballer behind him and gives him a nod. The footballer now holds on to Monty's shoulder, gripping him so he won't move. The sharp pain of Bryce's fits hit Monty's face, making his head spin round, the footballer quickly moves it back, another swing of the fits hits him, making him spit out blood. Bryce walks towards his car and opens up the trunk, Monty can only make out shapes, his eye sight now blurry. Bryce walks back over, baseball bat in his hand. "This is for the team, you fucking homo" As the baseball hits Monty's face, he falls down to the floor, he can feel the rest of the guys kicking into him from all sides, he stares at Bryce's feet just before he finally blacks out. Leaving him there to bleed out….

**A/n - Hey guys, I'm sorry if anyone found this upsetting or triggering, I just wanted to keep the same essences of the show, plus this is very important to the rest of the story. Hope you liked it and please feel free to leave some feedback.**


	14. Chapter 14

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****.**

**A/N –**** Hope you guys are enjoying this story, please feel free to leave some feedback.**

Montgomery tries open his eyes, but the pain from his swollen face stops him, he switches fingers and tries to move but he's in so much agony. He begins to hear ringing in his ear, a muddled sound, like someones voice. "N_urse! Nurse! He's awake!"_ He can't make out who the voice belongs to, he starts to feel light headed and with that, he blacks out again….

Monty wakes up in the hospital, his body still tender and bruised. He looks around the room, realizing he's in a private room. He notices a figure sitting at the right side of the bed, tries to smile at the sight of this person, but his ribs hurt and even attempting to breathe.

"Hey you, you're finally awake" Winston smiles

"hi" his voice is groggy, he sounds like he's not had water in months

Winston grabs the jug of water and pours it in the plastic glass, he puts the glass to Monty's lips and helps as he swallows the water.

"What are you doing here?" Monty asks.

"Well, when I heard what happened, I had to come see if you were ok" Winston shows a worry look on his face. "Do you remember what happened?"

"How can I forget" Monty states. "I mean, how did you find out?"

"Uh, it was all over my school, some kids were talking about it and when I put two and two together, I had to come see you"

"Fuck" he moans. "News travels fast, it only happened last night" Monty tries to laugh but the pain is too much for him,

"Last night?" Winston shows a surprised look on his face "Monty, it happened three weeks ago, you've been in a coma"

Monty turns round to face Winston, his face in complete shock "what? Three weeks in a coma for a beating?"

"It was more than a beating, Monty. They smashed your head in with a baseball bat, they broken your ribs and you had a collapsed lung"

"The fuck?!"

Winston places his hand on Monty's. The jock looks into his eyes, he tries to smile again. Winston jumps at the sound of the room door opening, he starts to feel awkward as Alex goes to the other side of the bed.

"Your back, I see" Alex says bitterly, not acknowledging that Monty just woke up.

"uh, yeah"

"every day for three weeks, you have a really good friend Monty" Alex's eyes still staring at Winston.

"I better go" he looks at Monty

"you sure?" Monty asks, Winston just nods. "okay, man. Thanks for coming by and telling me what happened"

"Sure, no problem"

"The fuck was that about?" Monty asks Alex.

"I just don't understand why he's here that's all and why he paid for this fucking room"

"He paid for the room?"

Alex snaps out of his bitterness towards Winston "anyway, that doesn't matter, you're awake!" he smiles. He leans towards Monty, giving him the softness kiss, but the footballer still flinches.

"sorry!"Alex says sympathetically nut now he had anger in his eyes "I'm going to fucking kill Bryce"

"No, no you're not!" Monty protests. He can see a look on Alex's face. "Fuck, Alex. You better of not said anything to him!"

"He can't get away with this Monty! He nearly fucking killed you!" Alex's voice is loud, anger and frustration all over his face.

"What good is it if you end up in a hospital bed as well huh? Or if he kills you?"

"My dad will be here soon, I think the nurse called him to tell him you woke up"

Monty grunts at the thought

"Are you going to tell him? Are you going to tell Bryce did this to you?"

"I don't know"

"Jesus Christ, Monty!" Alex shouts again "He can't get away with this"

"He's a rich white guy, Alex. He's already gotten away with it"

A few hours had passed, Alex is still at Monty's bedside. The bleached blonde teen was itching to ask why Winston was here, as far as he was aware they hadn't talked since Monty beat the crap out of him. So many questions he wants to ask his boyfriend but he knows this isn't the time to bring it up. Monty's mother arrived as soon as she got the call that her son woke up from his coma. She was in pieces when she walked into his hospital room. She really thought she was going to lose him.

She leaves to go get some coffee, she has barely slept since this all happened. Just seconds after she leaves, Deputy Standall enters. He asks Alex to leave so he can talk to Monty about what happened that night, but Alex demands to stay, Monty allows it.

The police officer grabs an extra chair from the room and sits down at the other side of the bed, he has his notepad in one hand and his pen in the other.

"So, Monty, lets start at the beginning, where did you go after the game?" he asks as he sits down on the chair.

Flashbacks of that night come flooding back, memories of him and Winston having sex. Panic and Guilt now on his face "why- why does that matter?"

"I just want a full picture of that night"

"uh, I was just driving around after the game"

"then what?"

"I went home and I can't really remember much after that"

Alex's face is now angry, he knows he's lying.

"There was a witness, one of your neighbors saw you getting jumped from behind at your property, they said you got dragged in to a blue van and drove north"

"It's all still a blur" Monty states

Deputy Standall knows he's lying "Alex said Bryce walker has something to do with this, is this true, son?"

"Like I said, it's still all a bit hazy"

Alex's dad lets out a huge sigh "Montgomery, if Bryce Walker did do this and if he did it because you're, uh, gay. Then that's that serious hate crime, kid"

Monty just nods.

The police officer now stands up "If anything from the night comes back to you, you call me ok?"

Monty just nods again.

Monty stayed in the hospital for another week until he got the all clear to go home. His body is still all bruised, his ribs are still tender but not as painful as they were. His face is still all bruised, with cuts around his eyes, lip and cheeks. But still a lot better than he was. Winston had came to see him again, this time he brought Amber with him. She hugged him as soon as she saw him and told him all is forgiven. He thanked Winston for the private room but stated it wasn't necessary. He also stated to Winston that maybe it was best if they didn't see each other for awhile, he was with Alex and his head is too messed up to deal with his love life at the moment. Winston was hurt by this, reminding him that the jock made it clear he wants to be with him, he said it that night before it went all wrong. But the rich teen understood and wants to give him as much space as possible.

Monty arrives home with his mother and Alex, as he enters his house, he sees Zach Dempsey and Justin Foley in the living room, they have turned the lounge into his temporary bedroom, with all his belongings and his bed. His mother explains that he will find it difficult getting up and down the stairs with his still bruised ribs and she thought this would be easier for him, well it was Alex's idea.

Justin and Zach grin as they approach him, but Monty doesn't share their excitement.

"Hey, man. You gotta know, we had nothing to do with that" Justin protests.

"we didn't hear about it until after it happened" Zach explains.

Monty's expression lightens "it's cool, guys"

"What he did was fucked up" Zach states.

"Totally messed up, we're done with him, we just want to play ball, that's it" Justin says. "We've got your back, dude, no matter what you decide"

Monty Smiles, He's so glad that some of the team were on his side but reality starts to set in, he will be back at school soon and he's pretty sure the whole school knows by now about his sexuality. Is ready for that? Is he ready to face Bryce and the rest of the guys who tried to kill? Will he finally turn Bryce in for what he did? All he knows right now is that he is not ready for the events that are about to come…


	15. Chapter 15

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****.**

**A/N –**** Hope you guys are enjoying this story, please feel free to leave some feedback. This will most likely be the last update until Thursday, I'm at college this week and off Thursdays. **

Monty has been staring at himself in the mirror for the past ten minutes now. You can barely see the cuts and bruises on his face now. The bruising on the rest of his body has now been recovered, he is feeling back to his old self, which means one thing, he fit enough to go back to school. He's been dreading this all weekend. Zach and Justin have been keeping him updated, at first they didn't want to mention anything to him but they thought he should know. Bryce Walker has been boating around the locker room on what he did to Monty. Some idiot from the team also spray painted the word "fag" on his school locker. The Janitor has cleaned most of it off but you can still see the remains of it. Deputy Standall had also been round, urging the the teen to turn Bryce Walker in, if had done this to someone who he claims is his "brother" then he can do this to anyone. Monty could see how much the deputy was taking this attack personally, after all it could have easily been Alex, his blood boiled at the thought. He hears a car pull up at the sidewalk of his house, he peeks through the window, he watches Zach Dempsey beep the horn. He is not ready for this, he can't deal with all the whispers, all the talks and seeing Bryce, he clutches his fits at the thought, all he wants to do is smash that smug pricks face in but he knows deep down it wont solve anything, he will be the one who ends up in jail. "Fuck it" he says out loud, he grabs his school bag and heads out the door.

As they reach to the parking lot, Monty finds it hard to breathe, Justin places his hand on the jocks shoulder and smiles "you've got this bro"

"Your the toughest mother fucker at this school, remind them of that" Zach reminds him.

Monty nods nervously. With Zach and Justin at his side, they walk to the main entrance, eyes are already on him, all he wants to do is run back to the car and get the fuck out of here but he doesn't want to known as a coward for the rest of his life.

His two buddies walk him to his locker, he notices two students staring at him, one whispers to the other. "What the fuck you looking at huh? You want to come over and say that shit to my face!" he shouts at them.

"Dude, chill" Justin says.

He slams his locker and heads towards history class. As he walks into the classroom, all eyes are on him. Alex gives him a welcoming smile. Bryce and some of the team are sitting at their desks at the back of the classroom, Bryce eyes are on Monty, he lets out a grin. "Good to see you back buddy"

This angers Monty and throws his bag on the floor now rushing over to the smug asshole "What the fuck did you just say?"

Zach and Justin try to pull him back.

"He's not worth it, Monty" Justin says.

"Listen to your bitch, Montgomery" Bryce and his friends laugh, but no one else does.

"Fuck you, Bryce" Justin shouts.

Monty sits at the desk next to Alex, he can tell this is going to be a long day.

Mr porter invites Monty to his office, this is was the icing on the top. The guidance teach asks if he feels safe being back at school and if he knows who his attacker was, although he had a good idea who was behind it. He also wanted to talk about the recent rumors in the school, that Monty may be gay. The jock laughs it off and states he doesn't want to talk about it. Once his meeting with Mr porter is done, he heads to the library.

Monty throws his bag on the table, making Tony jump from reading his text.

"Watch it" Tony moans

"Sorry, man" Monty sits down, opening up his bag.

"it'll die down"

"what?"

"The gossip, the stares, it'll stop" Tony gives him a reassuring smile.

"I fucking hope so, man" he stares at the black haired teen before he speaks again "how did you deal with it all?"

"well, if I remember correctly, it was you go called me a dirty little faggot"

"I know, man. I was terrible to you when you came out, I am sorry man" Monty shows a genuine look on his face.

"I get it, I was pretty angry too"

After school, Monty heads to the locker rooms, everyone goes all quiet when they see him arrive.

"What you doing here?" Bryce asks with his eyes wide.

"It's football practise right?" he answers as he opens up his locker.

Bryce now walks up to him, Monty turns to face him, their eyes burning in to each others. "I thought I made my feelings pretty clear" Bryce says through gritted teeth

"I don't give a fuck about your feelings, Bryce. I want to play football, that's all I give it a shit about and I'm not going anywhere" he doesn't back down, jaw now clenched. He looks around at all the guys in the lock room. "That goes for all of you fucking pricks, I'm gay and I wanna go state this season, if anyone has a problem with that, then it will be with the bat next time" he smiles.

He brushes past Bryce, who just stands there. Zach and Justin snicker as they Follow Monty on to the field.

All of his aggression came out on the field, he showed everyone that he was the same guy as before and he's not someone you want to fuck with, which just pissed Bryce even more.

After Practise, they head back to the locker room, Bryce is standing in Monty's direction, as he walks past, he leans in and whispers in Bryce's ear "Better kill me next time". He walks away, leaving Bryce with his face on the floor.

Monty, Zach and Justin walk to the car in the parking lot, Monty smiles at the sight of Alex waiting for him. Him and his friends fist bump one another, as they leave him there with Alex.

"Hey" Monty greets

"How was it?"

"Yeah, it's good to be back" he means that.

"Fancy a ride?" Alex grins.

Monty quickly gives Alex a peck on the lips before they get in the car.

As they get into the car, Alex stares at him, with a gaze in his eyes.

"I fucked Winston" Monty blurts out, he can't keep it in anymore.

Alex stares him at, his expression suddenly changes, anger in his eyes, his breathing getting heavier. "I figured" he says with little emotion.

"You knew?" he asks now surprised.

"I mean, you haven't seen him since last summer and all of a sudden he shows up at your bedside and pays for your room, it's not rocket science, Monty" His breathing gets louder "FUCK!" he screams inside the car and punches the wheel. "The fuck Monty! Why did you have to say it? Why couldn't you just in!" Anger in his face.

"I had to tell you, you had the right to know!

"I had the right to know" he words back as he scoffs. "Just get out"

"Alex, we should talk ab-"

"-GET THE FUCK OUT, MONTY!" he screams again.

"Fine" he huffs. He gets out of the car and Alex drives off as soon as he can, leaving the Jock standing there alone…

**A/n - I think I'm going to wrap this story up soon, maybe in the next few updates, who do you think Monty should choose and be with? Would love to hear your thoughts.**


	16. Chapter 16

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****.**

**A/N –**** Thanks everyone for your reviews, means a lot!**

Monty hasn't spoken to Alex in a week, he's not returned any of his calls nor texts, the bleached blonde teen has been ignoring him at school, walking past him in the halls acting like the jock doesn't even exist. It's turned into a right mess and Monty doesn't know how to fix it. It's Saturday afternoon, Amber suggests that they go out for lunch, they haven't seen each other since Monty was in hospital, she wants a proper catch up with him, now that they are talking again. Monty doesn't realize how much he actually missed the feisty blonde until now, she was a breath of fresh air and he needs someone like that in his life.

As they sat down at their table ready to order, Monty has the urge to ask about Winston, he hasn't seen him since the hospital either and he was missing him, missing seeing his face and that smile, god that smile.

He thought about driving up to the rich part of town and seeing him, he wanted to, but with everything going on with Alex, he fought against it.

"I told Alex" he blurted out

Amber shows a confused look on her face "Told Alex what?"

He just gives her a look, he's not stupid, her and Winston are best friends, there's no way he wouldn't of told her. She looks at him, not having a clue what he's on about.

"Winston? We fucked, while I was with Alex"

Amber giggles into her water

Monty clicks "You did know, didn't you?"

She laughs "I did, sorry! I just wanted to see if you would say it" she laughs again "Oh, Montgomery, you've come a long way" she smirks

"Fuck you!" he spits out playfully.

Her face now straightens "So, do you know what you want?"

Monty looks at the menu "Think I'm just going to go with the Burger deluxe"

She rolls her eyes "About Winston and Alex, dumb ass"

"oh" his face drops, he places his hands over his face "this has all came so complicated"

She smiles "It sure has"

"Has he said anything?"

"No, nope! I'm not being put in the middle of this, sort your own shit, you want to be with Alex, great, you want to be with Winston, great, I don't care either way"

Monty stares blankly, he thought he would at least get some good advice "That wasn't helpful at all"

Amber scoffs "I did say I'm not being caught up in this shit, however, as I said to him, I'm team Winston, all the way" she grins

This makes Monty laugh and playfully tells her to shut up.

Amber drops Monty off at back his house after the restaurant. He's really glad he did this, he needed today, everything has been so heavy lately, he needed to have fun, he's so happy he has her back in his life.

He watches her drive away, her car is no longer in sight. Instead of going in to his home, he jumps into his car and drives West.

He drives up Winston's driveway, he can see his blue sports car in the drive, so he knows the rich teen is home. He takes a deep breath, feeling nervous all of a sudden. He gets out of his car, he walks to the main door. Winston has already opened the door and walks towards the Jock.

Winston smiles "What are you doing here?"

"I wanted to see you" he states nervously

"I don't think this a good idea-"

"-I told Alex" Monty interrupts.

Winston's eyes are now wide and focused, he wasn't expecting that. "oh?" the rich teen finds the words to speak again "have you- I mean are you two now"

"i don't know, I told him and he ran off, I haven't had a chance to talk to him"

"oh, okay" Winston's expression is now confusion "so, why are you here?"

"I just wanted to see you" Monty states in a soft tone

"What is it you want, Monty? Because if I remember correctly you said you wanted to be with me then I don't hear from you for weeks"

Monty now feeling defensive " I got my head kicked in, did you forget that part?

"of course not"

"so, I'm sorry if I've been a little bit busy lately"

Winston sighs "Look, you clearly don't know what you want and I have given you as much space as you've needed, but I can't wait around forever, Monty"

Monty doesn't say anything else, he doesn't know what to say, how the hell did he get in this mess in the first place? He cares for both these guys. He watches Winston go back into his house, leaving him outside with his thoughts, more confused than ever.

His mother was working late at the community centre, so was just him tonight, this is the first Saturday in a long time that he's been alone, he would normally be at Bryce's partying til the early morning. How things have changed.

He enters his quiet and dark house, he heads up to his bedroom, he jumps at Alex's shadow on his bed.

"FUCK!" he gasps

"sorry" but there's no emotion in Alex's voice.

"What the fuck you doing here, Alex?" he says, still trying to catch his breath.

"I wanted to talk, but you weren't here"

"Hoe did you even get in?"

"The window"

Monty goes over to his bed and sits next to Alex. Alex stands up right away as soon as Monty sits down. "Where were you?" Alex asks.

"Was out with Amber, we went to lunch"

"wow, late lunch"

Monty doesn't want to lie anymore "Then I went and saw Winston"

Alex's face is hurt, he knew that's where the jock would have been but hearing it, made him feel a pain he's never experience before. "And?" his voice broke, trying to fight back the tears.

Monty sighs "Nothing happened, we just talked"

"about?"

Monty stands up, he places his hands on his face "About the fucking mess I have created!"

"Do you love him?" Alex's voice was quiet, more like a whisper.

"NO!" Monty scoffs as he makes a face. He wasn't lying but he wasn't honest either.

"Do you love me?"

"Fuck Alex!" he moans "Why are you asking me this?"

"It's a simple question Monty, you do or you don't"

"I don't know!" he admits

"You don't know?" Alex scoffs

"I don't know, Alex because I've never experienced it, I don't know how to love someone"

"That's bullshit"

"No, it's not! My family weren't exactly the warm and fuzzy type, Alex. I never had any of that shit, I've never had anyone around me to show me that, to show me love, compassion, any of that shit! So I don't even know what that word means!"

"if you hadn't beat the shit out of him, would we of got together?"

"Fuck, Alex!" Monty huffs with frustration.

"Answer it!" Alex spits

Monty paces up and down his bedroom. "what do you want me to say? I don't know!" he shouts

"I done Monty, I can't do this, you either want this or you don't there's no in between and I've got better things to do than wonder if Montgomery De La Cruz loves me or not"

Before Alex storms out, Monty can see how hurt Alex is about all of this and he does deserve a good explanation and he does deserve to know what Monty truly feels inside, but is the Jock just too broken to feel anything? Or is he just too scared to admit it, admit to himself? How did someone who hated who he was and could never admit to the world who is end up with two guys fighting over him? He knows he will make a decision soon and if so, will it be the right one?

**A/N - hey guys, sorry it's only one update today, I've been so busy with catching up on things, I have three new chapters up on Saturday! Please feel free to leave feedback. **


	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. Trigger warning on this chapter of talk of suicide**

**A/N –**** Hey guys, sorry I didn't update any chapters yesterday, was a crazy day and wasn't feeling very well. Hope you enjoy this chapter and please feel free to leave some feedback.**

Since Liberty High school found out that Monty is gay, the one secret, he was scared of anyone from the school finding out, it wasn't as bad as he thought, well apart of nearly being beaten to death by his so called friends. But everyone else at the school didn't really care. There is still some looks and whispers when he walks through the halls, but it's getting easier for him. He reminds some students of who he actually his and that puts them in their place. That was still one of his problems, people were still scared of him, regardless of his sexuality, they still saw him as the school psychopath, he liked that his reputation stopped people being horrible towards him but he doesn't exactly want to be branded the school psycho. Not anymore anyways. But he doesn't know how to make everyone see he's just a human being and he's not that scary as everyone thinks he is.

Monty, Zach and Justin have become very close, instead of hanging out with Bryce and the rest of the team, they have just been around each other, a tight unit, which annoyed Bryce. The two haven't interacted much since Monty stood up to him in the locker room. Just some snide looks from both of them during football games and in the locker room. But Monty had a feeling, a feeling that this isn't over. He can't put his finger on it, But he knows Bryce Walker and he isn't the type to just let things go. But Monty wasn't going to let that ruin anything, he wasn't going to let him give him that satisfaction.

Alex has been ignoring the Jock as well, since the conversation they had in the football players bedroom. Monty felt like he has had enough of all this relationship drama and wants to just enjoy his senior year, play football and have a blast with his new friends. As for Alex and Winston? That is still undecided. He just needs some time to himself, he thinks if he just stays away from them both for a while, things will come more clear to him, maybe he just needs to be alone for awhile? His life is a mess at the moment and he wants to fix it, tie up lose ends so to speak.

He starts that with Tyler Down. Monty has bullied Tyler since middle school. Tyler has always come off as frail and weird, always taking pictures of everyone with no reason at all of why he is taking them, so he was branded the creepy kid in school and this gave him a target on his back to be made fun of, and Monty took on that rule.

It's been playing on his mind lately, all the things he has done to him, all the nasty name calling, shoving him up against lockers, making the young teen scared shitless. Once, when Tyler was a freshman, Monty scared him so bad, the Down boy peed his pants, in front of the whole school. It was that one event that kept playing on the jocks mind and he felt so bad for it, he wants to make things right, he has to. Not for Alex nor anyone, for himself this time.

Sunday afternoon, Tyler is at the local park, taking pictures as usual, it was late Autumn and Tyler loves the fiery brown colour that beams though the trees.

The Teen stops quickly at what he is doing when he spots Monty coming his way. Tyler clenches his body, waiting for whatever Monty is going to do or say.

"Hey man" Monty greets as he's now standing in front of the Down boy.

"Hi" Tyler is guarded, his expression confused, the same look he had at the time in the library.

"Are you doing something for school or just for fun?"

"Just for fun" Tyler doesn't look at him, still weary of the Jocks actions. "What are you doing here, Monty? I've never seen you around the park before"

Monty lets out a sigh "Your dad told me you'd most likely be here"

Tyler's eyes are now wide "You went to my house?"

"Look man, I wanted to talk to you way from school" his face is genuine, you can see sadness in his dark eyes "I've treated you like shit for years, just because you're different and that's s pretty fucked up reason to treat someone like that and I am so sorry"

Tyler is speechless "Why are you saying this now?"

"Because when Hannah killed herself, because of all the shit that went down, all I thought was you, man. I did some fucked up shit to you and if I ever made you feel the way Hannah felt, the way I've felt myself, then I am truly sorry. I was an asshole, maybe I still am an asshole, but I never want to be the reason why someone wants to end their life and it makes me sick to my stomach, thinking you felt like that because of me"

Tyler's eyes were tearing up after hearing Monty's words. It was in fact true, he did make him feel like that, everyday when he had to go to school. "You thought about killing yourself?"

Monty hangs his dead, staring at his feet "For a long time, yeah. I didn't exactly have a Brady Bunch family and it made me hide apart of myself and the more I hid it the worst it got" He now makes eye contact with Tyler "I can't explain why I did what I did or said to you and I can't explain why I was like that, I think we would be at this park for year" he laughs nervously "But I want you to know, I'll never treat you like that again, man. We good?"

Tyler lets out a smile, he's still confused on what is going on, but he can see Monty really means what he has just said. Tyler nods "Yeah, we're good"

Monty spends the rest of the afternoon with Tyler, watching him take pictures of the places around them, Tyler even lets him take some shots as well, which Tyler laughs at how bad they were.

Sunday Evening, Monty just gets home from the park, his mother moans he has missed dinner, yet again. He reheats his dinner in the microwave and sits at the dining table.

"Everything ok, baby?" his mother asks with concerned eyes

"Yeah, all is good" he states as he starts eating his meatloaf.

His mother sits down next to him. "I worry about you"

He rolls his eyes, all he wants to do is eat his dinner and now his mother wants to talk about his feelings.

She sighs, she knows this is pointless and leaves him to it.

Later that night, his mother is catching up on her soap operas, when she sees her son standing at the door frame. "everything ok, baby?"

"Do you still want to talk?" he asks. He's still not too sure if he wants to talk to his mother about this, but he really doesn't have anyone else.

His mother scoots over, so there is room on the sofa for him, she pats her hand on the couch, indication for him son to next to her. Monty smiles.

He sits down next his mother, she turns off the TV, giving her son all of her attention. She doesn't speak, she waits for son to talk first, the last thing she wants is to make him uncomfortable.

"How- um, how do you know you love someone?" he asks, he hates opening up about his feelings, it's something he has had to learn on his own.

"wow, um" his mother wasn't expecting this question. "I think, you just now. Like a gut feeling in your stomach"

"Did you have that with-" he couldn't bring himself to say his name.

"god no" his mother laughs "your fah- I met him through our parents, they thought it was nice I got myself a husband and he was the best they could find" her mind goes somewhere else now, she smiles, with a sparkle in her eyes "Now, Alejandro, on the other hand" his mother grins, he's never seen her smile like that before.

"who is he?"

"I was sixteen, his father worked with my father, so sometimes he would help out, the more I got to know him, the more I liked him" his mother still smiling "I was so in love with him" she giggles.

Monty smiles, it was nice seeing his mother like this. "How did you know, though? That you loved him"

"Oh, I don't know, it started off like little things, the way he made me feel, butterflies in my stomach when I saw him, the way he smiled, it just did something to my heart, when something went bad in my life, he was the first person I thought of to go talk to, just everything about him, just ignited this fire in me, made me feel alive"

"What changed? I mean, why didn't you marry him instead"

She laughs "because your granddad would of killed me and him. Sometimes things just don't work out the way that you want it to be, doesn't mean your feelings change, they are still there, but sometimes it's hard to realize they are there"

Monty smiles at his mother, it's interesting to know a little bit of her life before she had him. But apart of him is sad for her, she could have had a better life for herself, if she didn't marry that piece of garbage.

He feels her advice has helped and he does understand what she was talking about, he does have those feeling, but the question is, who are those feelings are for? I think deep down he's always known, from the minute he had met this person, but is he ready to dive into something with this person when it's clear there's a lot of stuff he has to fix first? He will have to make a decision sooner rather than later, if he leaves it too late, he may just lose this person forever.


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. **

**A/N –****Please free to leave feedback, if you like.**

Alex Standall as still ignoring Monty, he made his feeling perfectly clear and there was nothing else to talk about, until the jock finally admits to himself what he wants and who he wants, he doesn't want to know. The jock misses the bleached blonde teen, he misses the friendship they had and just hanging out and talking about everything and nothing. He tries to talk to him at school, but Alex just walks away.

Ever since it was known to Liberty high that Montgomery was gay, Ryan Shaver has been like a dog with a bone, trying to pressure the footballer to do an exclusive interview for his school magazine. Monty has told him many of times to fuck off, but Ryan isn't the type to back down, he's even guilt tripped Monty, stating he has a duty for the athlete's at this school to understand what it's like for a gay guy on a sports team to be around that stigma with toxic masculinity. Monty can see Ryan has a point, but he just isn't the guy for the job, last thing he needs to have more of a target on his back, things on the football team aren't exactly welcoming. Especially with Bryce Walker on his team.

Bryce has started to give Monty shit for his recent friendship with Tyler Down, the two have been spotted in the halls talking and have even sat next to one another during one of their classes, this has gave Bryce the excuse to say some homophobic words to Monty, making out he and Tyler must be an item.

Monty has been trying to control his anger when it comes to Bryce Walker, every time he sees him, he just gets a flashback of that night and nothing will satisfy him more than to beat the absolute shit out of him. But he knows it wont end well, it would be Monty himself who would get arrested and that doesn't help anyone. The footballer wants to change, not to be what everyone expects him to be.

Monty is in the library, studying for an English test, Courtney sits down next to him, a huge grin on her face.

"Yes, Courtney?" Monty moans

"I saw that you haven't bought any tickets for the Winter ball"

He rolls his eyes, he hates how fake she can be at times. "I'm not going"

"Why not? It's the last dance of the year, you have to go!"

"Why does it matter to you, if I go to some fucking school dance?"

Courtney's face drops, her expression now more genuine "fine, Do you know how many kids are out at this school?"

Monty shakes his head, he doesn't really care to be honest.

Courtney sighs "Five, five out of how many students-"

He stops her "Courtney, what does this have to do with me?"

"We need to show the student body that it's ok to be who you are, to be able to go to dances with the person you really want to be with instead of taking someone you could care less about"

"Why do you care all of a sudden who takes who to dances?" he could see right through her bullshit

"I want to start a new club for gay and lesbian students at the school but principal Bolan wont allow it unless we have at least ten members signed up" she huffs

"And you thought I I show up at the dance holding hands with some guy, people will all of a sudden come out of the closet?" he laughs at how stupid that sounds

"You ruled this school, Monty, in a way you still do, if people saw someone as popular as you with Alex, then maybe they will feel comftortable coming out themselves"

"Alex? Why do you think I'd bring Alex?"

"Aren't you guys together?"

Monty sighs "Fuck off, Courtney"

His straight to the point words shut Courtney down, leaving her speechless and pissed off at the same time. As she leaves, Monty laughs to himself.

Monty, Zach and Justin are sitting outside of the school having lunch. Justin is going on about how good things are with Jessica are, Monty pretends to be interested, with a few nods and yeah's now and again, Zach is pretty much.

Alex Standall walks up to the table where the jocks are sitting, as Monty looks up, he's surprised that Alex has came up to him.

"Word of warning, Courtney is on the war path, trying to start up some gay club"

"Yeah, I know, she already got me" he laughs but Alex doesn't laugh with him.

"okay, well that's all I wanted to say" Alex was about to leave, Monty grabs his hand to stop him.

"Can we talk?"

"About what?"

"you know what about"

Alex is about to open is mouth, when Monty can see Amber running up the steps, her face was white as a ghost and tears running down her face"

"Monty!" she sobs as she gets closer to him

The jock jumps out of his seat "Amber? What's wrong?" Panic now on his face.

"it's, it's" she tried to get the words out, but all she can do is cry "Winston, he's in hospital, it's bad, Monty, really bad"

Monty can feel all the blood in his body rush to his head, he feels like he's going to be sick "I don't understand- what happened?" he asks trying to fight back the tears.

Monty glances behind Amber, he can see the sheriff of the local police department walking towards them, he is with two other police officers.

"Alex Standall? You are under Arrest of the assault on Winston Williams" The sheriff states as he puts Alex's arms behind his back and places handcuffs on him. Monty's head is spinning.

Alex stares at Monty "Monty, this is a mistake, I'll explain, I promise"

Monty and Amber watch the police officers escort Alex into the cop car. Monty places his hands on his face as he rubs them. "What the fuck just happened?" he asks with absolute confusion, pain and anger.


	19. Chapter 19

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. **

**A/N –****Please feel free to leave feedback, if you like.**

_Alex Standall is standing outside the Hillcrest private high school, he is feel angry and anxious as he watches the students exit the large building, His eyes fixed on the main door of the school. He watches Winston exit with two of his friends, one at each side of them. Alex full of rage, starts walking towards him. Winston looks at him, wondering what he's doing here but the Standall teen doesn't give him the chance to speak, as his fist now bouncing off of the rich teens face. Winston's body stumbles back, his two friends now in front of him ready to attack Alex. "What the fuck?" one of his friends shout. The rest of the student body stop on their tracks, all eyes now on Alex. Winston's body is now steady, he pushes past his friend and tells them to step down and reassures them everything is ok._

"_I deserve that" Winston states._

_Alex's breathing is all over the place, ready to punch him again._

"_If you calm down, we can actually talk about this"_

_Alex only nods, he's too wound up to speak._

_Winston takes him to a local coffee shop, just ten minutes away from his school. They pick a table further up the back, away from the busy crowd. Winston places the two coffees on the table as he sits down across from Alex._

_Alex stares at his coffee "Why him? Why Monty? He beat the shit out of you, why go back to that? And don't give me that it's complicated bullshit" _

_Winston sighs "I don't know, probably the same reason why you like him" Winston takes a sip of his coffee then places the mug back on the table "We met and it just clicked you know, like something just fitted right, at first it was just a sexual attraction"_

_Alex rolls his eyes. He's not sure he wants to hear the rest of this. _

"_But over the summer, it became more, he told me things, a lot of things, he really opened up and I found myself falling for him"_

"_But he beat the shit out of you!" Alex snaps._

"_Yeah, but we both know, it wasn't me he was hitting, it was everyone, everyone that made him feel like nothing, don't get me wrong he was a prick for doing it but I got it"_

"_And what, just one night his dick ended up in you?"_

_Winston nearly chokes on his coffee, that was one way to put it "A girl he knew, killed her self"_

"_Hannah" Alex blurts out_

"_uh, yeah. He took her death really badly"_

"_wait, what? Why he barely knew her" Alex is shocked with this new information, he had no idea._

"_I think that was the point, A part of him felt guilty, the way he treated her, the way his friends treated her but mostly, he related to her, as for a long time he to thought about it"_

_Alex stares at his coffee in front of him, feeling jealous that Monty couldn't open up to him the way he did with Winston._

"_So, yeah, we talked and we agreed to be friends"_

_Alex scoffs at his words "friends?" he makes a face._

"_It wasn't until a week or two after that, he showed up at my door and I don't know what else to say, it just happened"_

"_So, what? You fucked my boyfriend and then he left and it was the end of it? There's more to it, you wouldn't of stayed at his bedside for weeks if it was just a one off hook up"_

_Winston takes a deep breath "It was the night he got attacked, before he left, he said he was going to leave you"_

_Alex can feel a lump in his throat "For you right?"_

_Winston nods._

_Alex tries is hardest to keep his emotions under control "Do you love him?" he bluntly asks._

_Winston laughs nervously "I care a lot about him, do I think we can have something amazing? Yes, I do"_

"_Have you spoke to him since?"_

"_No" Winston is telling the truth "I told him, he has to make a choice and haven't heard from him since, so I take it he has already picked" sadness on his face._

"_He hasn't, well far as I'm aware. I've not exactly been talking to him either"_

"_I am sorry or the part that I played in on homecoming, I knew you guys were together and I slept with him anyways and that wasn't cool of me, I'm sorry"_

"_I'm sorry for punching you, even though you deserved it"_

_Alex leaves the coffee shop not long after that, he's glad he had that conservation with Winston, but it didn't make him feel better, if anything, it made him feel worse. After leaving Winston, the bleached blonde teen got in his car and went home_

Monty is sitting in the waiting room at the police station. He knows he should be at the hospital with Amber, but the jock wants answers, he needs to know what's going on and why Alex as been arrested for attacking Winston. He sits on the chair, his body can't stay still, his legs constantly tapping the ground. His eyes not once moving away from the room Alex is in.

Monty jumps out of the seat at the sight of Alex coming out the room.

"Alex, the fuck is going on?!" Monty asks as runs up to him,

"They think I assaulted him"

"Why? Why do you think that?!"

Alex sighs "Because there's witnesses that saw me hit him outside his school"

Monty's face drops "the fuck Alex?" the jock shouts

"Why do you think?" Alex snaps back "I only punched him, we went somewhere to talk afterwards, I left him in the coffee shop, I didn't attack him, Monty, not the way there suggesting"

Monty lets out a deep breath, he rubs his face with his hands. Alex starts to walk away, Monty stops him "We need to talk about this"

"No, we don't. Just go, go be with him" Alex's dad now by his side, escorting him out the station.

Monty waits for Winston's parents to leave the room before entering. He nearly bursts into tears at the sight of The rich teen. There's a bandage around his right eye, his lip swollen and cut, there's a wound wrapped up in a bandage at the left side of his body. This was killing Monty.

"Hey" Winston's voice was weak.

Monty rushes over to him "I can't believe this, look at you" tears running down his cheek.

"It's ok"

"No, it's not" he wipes the tears from his face. "Did, did Alex do this to you?"

Winston tries to sit up, but winches in pain "Alex? Wait what? The police think Alex did this? No, he was angry about us and lashed out but we talked it through, he didn't do this"

Monty places his hand on Winston's "Then who did?"

"Bryce, Bryce walker"

Monty's face drops "what?" Anger all over his face

"It's my own fault"

"How the fuck is this your fault?" Monty says through gritted teeth.

"Remember last summer, when you kicked the shit out of me?"

Monty nods, not his proudest moment.

"Well, when you went in the car to cool off or whatever, Bryce paid me not to tell anyone about what happened"

"Yeah, I figured as much"

"But, he also paid me not to go near you again, he says if I do, he'd kill me, well not directly, but that's the expression I got"

Monty clenches his fist "I'm going to fucking kill him"

"Don't, he's not worth it"

"Look at you!?" he shouts

"Monty, I don't want you to get into trouble because of this and I don't want you to get hurt, you nearly died"

"So, what? I'm just to sit and let this prick get away with this? Let him get away with it again, no I can't do that!" Monty leaves. Winston tries to shout his name to come back, but his body is too weak, he now fears what's going to happen now.

**A/n - This is the last update I'm doing today, will upload new chapters tomorrow. Hope you're enjoying this. Feel free to leave feedback.**


	20. Chapter 20

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. **

**A/N –****Please feel free to leave feedback, if you like.**

Monty enters Liberty high school full of rage. He ignores everyone around and pushes past students in the halls, he's on a mission and that mission is Bryce Walker. As he walks towards the gym, his fists are tight and his jaw is clenched shut. All he can think is killing this son of a bitch, he doesn't care what the outcome is as long as Bryce pays for what he did. The Gym doors spring open, making Clay Jensen and some other class mates jump, Clay notices right away that something isn't right and shouts on Monty as he walks past, but the Jock ignores him. Bryce, Justin, Zach and the rest of the football team are in the locker room, Bryce is making some snide comments about Justin because he took Monty's side and not his, he's giving a talk about brotherhood when Monty enters, without stopping, he flies for Bryce, Monty now on top of him, punching him rapidly, Justin and Zach trying to pull him of the Rich teen.

Justin manages to pull Monty off of him, The jock realizes his lip is bleeding, he wipes the blood off with his sleeve and stares at the stocky figure on the floor. "You've completely lost it, Montgomery" Bryce spits out the blood from his mouth

Monty laughs "I've lost it?" Monty walks back over to him, ready for round two but Justin wraps his arms around him, stops him from moving. "You thought you were going to get away with this huh? You thought I wouldn't find out"

Bryce now grins, showing off the blood sticking to his teeth "Oh, I was hoping for it" Bryce stands up, he walks towards Monty and Justin. "But just like last time, you ain't going to do shit, you're a coward, Montgomery, always have been"

"You're going down for this?" Monty says through gritted teeth

"Going down for what? I didn't do shit" he smiles.

"It's a hate crime, Bryce. You'll get at least ten years, say goodbye to your Precious football team" Monty grins.

"sure I will" Bryce looks around and points to the rest of the team "these guys will back me up, you see unlike you, they actually have my back"

Monty glances around the locker room, he can see it in all their faces, they don#t want to serve ten years in prison, he can see that they all feel that this has gone too far now. Monty smirks "you sure about that, Bryce? They don't take orders because they respect you, they take orders out of fear, but they will son learn what a sad, pathetic, mommy issue motherfucker you really are"

Monty nudges his shoulders to get Justin to release him. Just backs up. "Enjoy your freedom while it lasts" he laughs one more time before he leaves.

Monty comes out the police station. Amber is standing next to her car. "how did it go?" she asks.

"They just took my statement and asked why I took so long reporting it"

Amber nods "But with your statement and Winston's, they will have to arrest him, right?" She has fear in her eyes, all she wants is for Bryce Walker to pay for what he's done.

"I don't know, Bryce has money, they can afford fancy ass lawyers, maybe this has been a waste of time" doubt now in his voice.

At the corner of his eye, he spots a Liberty high Letterman jacket coming his way, as he focuses on the figure coming towards him, anger now on his face, "The fuck you doing here" Amber has to pull Monty back, in fear they may be a fight.

"I don't want any trouble" Charlie protests. "I came to help"

"Help?" Monty spits "Help with what?"

"Me and a few others have been talking, we think Walker has taken it too far now and he needs to stop"

Monty scoffs " you just want to cover your own asses"

"We want to do the right thing"

"Where was that when you guys were pinning me down and beating me with a baseball bat huh?" Monty screams

"Look man, things got out of hand, we weren't even there when he did that to that guy"

"That guy? His name is Winston!" Monty spits

"Bryce did that on his own, for some of us, this is our last year, we just want to play ball and graduate from that shit hole, I'm going to make a statement, some of the others have already done it, it's not right and we just want to fix it"

Monty just nods, he doesn't know what else to say, he can't really be angry, he too took a good while to do the right thing, he just hopes this is all finished with now.

Monty arrives at his house, he can see Alex sitting outside on the porch. He smiles at the bleached blonde teen and they both head inside.

"How did it go?" Alex asks.

"Yeah, okay, I think, I guess it's just a waiting game now"

"Monty-"

"-Alex- I think we need to talk"

Alex sits down on the sofa in the living room, he can feel his heart racing, he knows exactly what the jock wants to talk about him and even though he's been wanting this conversation, he's now in dread of it.

Monty gets on his knees, he places his hands on Alex's hands, and his Brown eyes stare into Alex's green eyes. "I think you're amazing, a great pain in the ass most of the time, but amazing, you helped me through so much shit and last summer, you helped me come to terms with a lot of things-"

"-But?" Alex cuts him off.

Monty sighs, this was a little bit out of his comfort zone "I don't feel the way that you feel, I-I care about you, but" Monty's voice breaks, the last thing he wants his to hurt him.

"But, I'm not Winston?" his tone is sharp, he's trying so hard to fight back the tears"

"It's just different with him, I can't explain it"

"It's fine" Alex's eyes now filling up with water.

"It's not fine, I don't want to hurt you" a single tear runs down his cheek.

"I wanted you to own up to your feelings and you did, I can't fault you for that"

"I want us to be friends"

Alex rolls his eyes

"I know, I know it sounds like a cliche, but you do mean a fucking lot to me Alex, you're one of the reasons why I am still alive!"

"But I'm not the main reason am I?"

Monty doesn't speak, he looks down at the floor now, this was so painful, he's never experienced anything like this before and he hates it. Alex couldn't stay any longer, he was hurting way too much, he knew this was going to be the outcome but hearing it out loud was too much for him. As the main door shuts, Monty still on his knees, sobs at the outcome of his actions.

Later that day, Monty goes to visit Winston in the hospital, Amber is sitting at his bedside, reading him the latest gossip from a trashy magazine. They both beam a smile at the sight of Monty entering the room.

Monty's face is puffy and read, Winston can tell he's been crying. "Everything ok?" he asks the jock.

Amber makes an excuse to leave to let them two talk. Monty sits down on the chair next to the bed, he stares at the injured teen, he notices how much his eye is healing already and the bandage is now off. "You're looking good" his voice was soft, still sad from the events earlier.

Winston scoffs "I look awful"

Monty places his hands on Winston's "No, you look great" He stares into his eyes.

"Everything ok?" Winston remembers the look the jock showed when he first entered the **room**

"I-I finished it with Alex" Monty states.

"Oh" Winston says surprised. "Do you want to talk about it?"

"Not really, it was already horrible, I don't think repeating it, will be a good idea"

"Okay, that's okay, we can watch some TV?

Monty laughs "I-I want us to give this a shot"

Winston beams a smile "yeah?"

Monty nods "I think you're incredible, and if you tell anyone this I will beat the shit out of you again" he jokes "When I see you, like, just even a glance at you and my heart races and I can't control this feeling that I just want to walk over to you and never stop kissing you, I can't predict the future, I don't know what will happen, but I want to figure it all out, with you"

Winston smiles "does this mean your my boyfriend now?" he jokes

"Shut the fuck up" Monty rolls his eyes. He leans over and places his lips on Winston's. It was a longing kiss, a kiss that was desperately needed, like they have been both aching for each other. It was perfect…

**A/N - Hey guys, I know some wont be happy with who Monty chose, this was suppose to be an aimed Monty/Alex fic, but as I was writing and the way I was writing it, just seemed to make sense that Monty chose Winston. It felt right for me. Sometimes when I write my imagination just runs wide and I just go with the flow and just seemed like a better fit, sorry if some didn't like the outcome. **


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer – Original characters and original story belongs to the creators and Netflix.**

**Warning – very strong language like on the show/Trigger warning for offensive language****. **

**A/N –****Please feel free to leave feedback, if you like.**

_My name is Montgomery De La Cruz, I'm eighteen, I play football and baseball and I'm gay. I knew I was gay at the age of twelve years old, but with having a dad like mines, it was impossible for me to ever act on it. I think deep down he knew, he knew what I was and that's why he hated me so much. I remember one day when I was around thirteen, the news was on and it was about a fifteen year old kid who got beaten to death and raped by guys on the basketball team. My dad turned to me and said "if you ever turn out to be one of those dirty faggots, I'll do a lot worse to you than those kids did" his words stuck to me like glue and the imagine of what kid went through, never left my mind. I knew from that day on I'd never be who I was. It's not a choice, I can't help being who I am but I tried my damn fucking hardest not to be. I joined sports to prove that I was a "real boy" and when I around that sports environment, I saw what these guys said and did to people who were gay and for a long time, I was one of those guys, I was homophobic and horrible around those who were different but they weren't different not to me, as I was the same as them but no one knew that. I became bitter and angry but most important, I was lonely. For the longest time I wish I was dead, I didn't want to be me anymore, I prayed that I could be someone else, someone "normal" but I am normal and it's took me a long time to realize that. We are all normal, whether you're gay, lesbian, bi or transgender, we are all normal, there's nothing wrong with us. It took a good few people to make me realize that, people who didn't give a shit who I was and just accepted it right away and I'm so grateful for that. If you're feeling what I was feeling, don't be afraid, it is scary, admitting to the world who you are but if you have people around you, positive people, then trust them, don't go through it alone. There's a new club started at school, for Gay, Lesbian, bi and transgender students, even if you're still not sure, you're still welcome, the club will support you and will be there for you when you're at your lowest, when you feel like giving up, they will be there. Don't be like me, don't pretend and push it away, it will only get worse and believe me, you don't want to feel like that. Courtney is the president of the club and as annoying as she is, she is trying to make Liberty high a better experience for students finding it difficult with their sexuality. Don't let those assholes win, be who you are and love yourself for it. _

"And cut!" Ryan Shaver shouts.

Monty takes of the mic attached to his Letterman jacket. "what that okay?"

"Monty! My god, Monty, that was perfect!" Ryan beams a smile.

"So, you're going to stop harassing me now?" Monty moans

"Yes! You will never see this cute face again"

Monty rolls his eyes and scoffs. He leaves the empty classroom. He's feeling good about that interview, he's not sure opening up to the full student body was a good idea, but it still feels good he's did, even though he mostly did it to get Ryan off his back.

In the last two months, Bryce Walker was charged and Arrested for the hate crime of Winston Williams, he is serving a five year sentence. He was found not guilty of the crime against Monty, but the jock still felt satisfied with the outcome.

Things have been going great for the Jock, he made captain of the baseball team, his grades were going up and he had a great unit of friends, Tyler, Alex and Clay had become apart of the lunch hall ritual now. He was also looking at a baseball scholarship for college, he's finally getting out this town but he's not too sure if he wants that now, he spent so much time dreaming about escaping this place and now, he can't think of anywhere else he'd rather be.

After school, he heads to the crowded parking lot, he beams a smile as soon as he sees Winston waiting at his car, he rushes over to the beautiful man in his life and kisses him, the stares doesn't even bother him anymore.

For a long time, Montgomery De La Cruz, longed for something, for something better, for something to make his life worth it. He doesn't know what the future will bring or what will happen, all he knows, he couldn't be happier…..

**THE END.**

**A/N - I just want to say thank you to everyone who has enjoyed this fic, I loved writing it, thank you so much to the readers who have left feedback and enjoyed this! Thanks again.**


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